Good vs Evil

CIMG1176 Today was the much anticipated joint party of Rex, Hess and Shing, and as normal we attempted to scare people off with an elaborate theme for dressing up. I will subtly now copy the facebook group information in the name of art:

During the night, you must find your NEMESIS and IMG_1249JUXTA-your-POSITION in the game by EVIDENCING your achievements by form of [NAKED] PHOTOGRAPHY! Penalties of SHOTS and sorts will be involved.

Luckily this didn’t happen, or I just don’t remember it happening really because I drank a beer or two… Rex, Shing and I went to Camden in the morning to finish off our costumes, not that successfully, but I did find a necklace with some form of cross on, and we got to have coffee AND Paella. Man I love Paella, don’t you? Saffron baby, it’s where it’s at.

IMG_1208After our successful return we began decoration of our house, though tbh it was mainly raffle and shing, green lighting and foliage made our kitchen a perfect Garden of Eden, with the dining room and the living room being Heaven and Hell respectively, via placement of various clouds, and red based products + lighting.

People started to arrive, and I was surprisingly CIMG1219impressed at the eclectic mix of costumes, from Angels, Messiahs and Devils to Lara Croft, The Riddler and Tron, I think most bases were covered including vast amounts of alcohol. I would like to recount vastly humourous memories from the party but unfortunately I was fuzzed out by the drugs in my vein. I think the video below should be able to mostly summarise the evening. Jesus dancing with an ugly sister/hooker. Classic blasphemy.


Don’t hate on me…

CIMG1174 Well this week was filled of hateful work, which I currently loath with exciting rapidity and wit. During the week I started to feel crapper and crapper until I was too ill today to make it in. Luckily, with a good sleep in and my weight in vitamin C I recovered enough to meet Rex after work for a beer or two near his work, before meeting Boon, Rachel and Shing in Liverpool St to go to Moshi Moshi for sushi. CIMG1173 Man sushi is awesome, and the restaurant looks amazing, as these photos prove. Also that we had fun and I’m cool, etc etc. Wham.

Dublin - Monday

CIMG1155 Felt a bit jank in the morning, and shattered due to the vast quantities of poison our jovialness forced us to consume amongst the underage teeny boppers. Checked out of our lovely hostel after the required faffing and multi showering, then walked to find somewhere for a cooked breakfast without throwing up all over Adam. Saw the adequate Dublin Castle which was CIMG1160oddly blended between old classic castle, modern, and crazy Spanish architecture. We then just flapped around nearby in our slightly tipsy state, playing on a fountain. Went to a cool park near the club, and Dan got shat on by a bird, highly hilarious at the time, especially as I managed to dodge the splash back. We went to chill in the nearby shopping centre and pretended we were 15 again, and we were in Virgin, as opposed to being 23 and fighting liver disease. CIMG1166 We're so cool. Grabbed some lunch in the Temple Bar Bar, which turned out to be surprisingly cheap all along, and then headed back to get the bus to the airport and fly successfully home. Very good, if somewhat expensive trip of everyone involved.

Dublin - Sunday

CIMG1070 Because we’re clever and the such like a few of us got the free breakfast that the hostel offered, which consisted of jam, toast and coffee, but was free, which everyone needs in Dublin. We took ages to leave because of 9 people sharing 1 shower, though the shower itself was pretty good. As opposed to yesterday it was a beautiful day, walked along river, which looked much better in the sun, to the Guinness Factory, past Voodoo pubs, and crazy 'graffiti’. CIMG1091

The Factory itself was very cool, just walking around the grounds to get to the entrance as you are surrounded entirely by huge brick walls. Reminded me of My Left Foot, for some reason. Inside the factory we saw various interesting exhibits, saw how they made Guinness, they faked making a batch from someone hitting a button. CIMG1097It’s amazing how much the Guinness company has done, they used to own HUGE cargo ships to ship Guinness all over the world, I guess now they just hire  them or something. There were lots of advertising material as well, including a Guinness art gallery of sorts. We then got to pour our own pint after being shown how to, which ruled and we got to enjoy it on top of their tower, CIMG1100overlooking the grey dull view of Dublin (where it was clouding over already). Still very enjoyable.

We walked back, and went through the town, after more dithering over food, a few of us got a very cheap(for Dublin) Chinese because everywhere is CIMG1134expensive. Met back up at the hostel. Went for dinner at a Crepe house, followed by a nice little game of ring of fire with extremely expensive vodka we got from a  Spa. And hess revealed that fucking someone with a nipple like rexes would make him ejaculate faster than if he was fucking the same person without a pierced nipple. Afterwards we went to a pre-booked comedy night in a tiny room up the top of a pub. Surprisingly awesome as the 2nd out of  3 acts was Doogle CIMG1152 from Father Ted! Very few people, and they didn't insult anyone. Good stuff. Then we walked out to a club further from town that one of the bar folk told us about, and we partied away. Very good night, crazy drunk humour dancing.

I bought this for your mum…


Dublin - Saturday

CIMG1038 After arriving at some crazy hour at the airport, we bust out some early morning Guinness action, so we could compare the English stuff, with what awaited us in the land of true beer related glory. Flight wasn’t too bad, and we all got seats moderately close together, though I spent some insane amount of money on a tiny can of Pepsi. Possibly £1.80. I fear this trip may be expensive.

After successfully not landing in any rivers CIMG1039we grabbed the cheap bus to town and found our hostel surprisingly easily, deep in the heart of Temple Bar. That’s a place not an actual bar I’ll have you know, cobbled streets for miles. Or at least a few hundred metres. Dumped our bags in our hostel, pretty cool we got a whole 10 bed room to ourselves, though only one shower which may cause difficulties in the morning as our level of faffage is high on the Richter scale. Our first port of call was obviously the Temple Bar, which was indeed an actual pub, CIMG1041though named after the area not the other way. Obviously we all got our first Guinnesses in, extremely nice, though rather similar to what we had in the morning, though vastly more expensive at around £5.50 a pint? Ireland is shockingly expensive, and the exchange rate is worse than Arsenal’s current performance. After christening Dublin, we wandered around the local, past a load of kids all on stilts, and searched for a place to eat lunch. When I say searched I obviouslyCIMG1057 mean we dithered some what, though eventually settled on quite a nice place not too far from the hostel. I got some form of traditional Irish dish,  I suspect a stew or a casserole. Dan foolishly had nothing as he wanted to save money and just possibly drink alcohol, so we obviously had some generic Guinness alternative stout, which was just as nice, and nearly as expensive! Rex tells me they also played The Corrs in the restaurant.

CIMG1059 After lunch we strolled along the river, which really was quite small and not very spectacular, nothing on the Thames. Though it was a bit grey in general, the sky and the city. Went through town and a shopping precinct, to where we saw a huge spike, that was for some reason, possibly to signify we all survived the Millennium. After which we went over the Butt Bridge (HAW HAW LOLLERSKATES). Tracey and Cory decided to go look at the university while the rest of us aimed for the nearest non stabby looking pub and had an expensive Guinness or two.  We played some form of drinking game, that was a lot like arrogance but involved a culminating bet on a coin toss. Good fun, and the CIMG1054 pub was really nice. In our ultimate wisdom we decided to go to a Thai restaurant, which had a cheapish deal for Dublin, but was actually expensive, around 20+ quid for a 3 course meal. Following which we went to a few pubs to try and find somewhere with cheaper beer, and I think we found a Guinness alternative for £4, though maybe £4.50. Afterwards I frequented the Spa before returning triumphant, but a bit poorer, to the hostel for a well earned sleep.

I’ll enter YOUR post title

After work it seemed apt that Rex and I should frequent the Putch and Judy in Covent Garden and have a frost Fosters in the cold. Then we met up with Shing, after she had some crazy sugar-based cake she had, followed by going to some crazy wine bar just across the Covent (no drinks though, just mild confusion).

In a bid to find food, we failed to discover the location of the Mongolian Buffet, so found a suspicious curry house that was 20% off, right next to another one with an identical offer. Though the other guy was more “up in our grill”.

The Sleeps.

The Prettiest Moment

Work sucks, spend most of my time trying to get my dev environment to behave and do what it’s meant to do as no one seems to have set it up correctly, or can. Foolish. I also had to “fix” my xp as it couldn’t update and claimed that I had a pirated copy for some reason.

It doesn’t claim that anymore…

Spital and Dicks

Yesterday we met Hess in the Stabford Fox, mm fox. The normal mix of cocktails and humour ensued, then we decided to hit up Spitalfield Markets and got a very nice Mexican from Las Iguanas, during which I trashed the restaurant with a freak wind I conjured by opening the front door to get some cash. Classic. Afterwards we grabbed a pint in Dirty Dicks (haw haw) before hitting the sack.

Today we have been mostly having cheap buffet from the Stratford Yoe Bo, no classy, but cheapish. In the evening we bust out some Jay and Silent Bob. Not quite as funny as I remember, but still of a high calibre.

Andy’s Birthday

To try and survive January’s inevitable attempt at drowning me in Birthdays we met up with Ad in Victoria, bust out a few drinks, before heading off to Croydon where we met Andy, and friends in Loop. Which is a pool bar that has the cheapest drinks in London. Maybe. It was excessively cheap though, and most of us guys, apart from the Rexasaurus, played pool. A game that I have at this moment forgotten, which involved lives, and Tom accidently being awesome and therefore winning lots of money and everyone being happy. After Loop we horrendously decided to go to Reflex, which is a hateful place of such hellish proportions that I didn’t mind leave a bit early. We ran across a road, which was enough to make Rex throw up everywhere, which was highly hilarious, and ended the evening on a high note.

Life is a test and I get bad marks

Dates mean nothing to me these days, as hours and minutes are indistinguishable, just another tooth on the cog of the clock counting down to the day I have the courage to tell you I love you, probably in unison with my very last mortal breath….


Nah I don’t feel like that, I just haven’t written emotastically, in my journal, avoiding caffeinated hallucinations in a coffee merchant, for a while. I’m extremely behind on my blog, and all things of suspicious circumstance. Work is getting better, feel like I’m achieving. My weekends are pretty full in the next few weeks, what with the liver suicide that is Dublin, to the liver cremation that is the 31st of January. I can only assume by then I will have fixed the entire system at work, and will take voluntary redundancy with a huge fat pay packet. Win for Tom once more.

Tonight I’m meeting my recruitment agent for a beer. No one on this plane of existence knows why. But it sure beats not drinking beer. Can I get a “Boo Ya”? No really. I lost my last one during the great storm of 2012. That time when I time travelled. To the future. And Things.

Brand New blow my brain. Stand back C#, your caffeinated emo son has arrived to take over…

That’s what she said.

Breast Taking Views

CIMG1012 I like sushi. In my mouth. Which is what we mainly did today, in Notting Hill Gate, in a very homely and empty sushi restaurant that Shing knew. I got a Sapporo beer, as they are indeed the greatest of Japanese beers. We did unfortunately end up spending around 20 quid each on sushi as we couldn’t decide what types to have. Very yummy though. Raw fish is good for you, or so I hear. Or it kills you viciously and with no remorse. Like robots. More tasty though.CIMG1020

Our main reason for existence today was in fact to go to the Ice Sculpting Festival by the Natural History Museum, which turned out to be around 6 ice sculptures. Was still cool (haw haw) though. We spent the rest of the time going around the Natural History Museum, which is pretty awesome, especially the volcano and escalator that travels through the earth.

CIMG1024 Afterwards we obviously had to recover from all the knowledge we absorbed with ease and grace, so we bust open some coffee to cleanse our souls. Then we returned home for sleep and rejuvenation.

Mirror’s Edge: Completed


Let the weekend heal us…

CIMG0992 To celebrate the end of my first week, though mainly for Rex’s birthday, we all met once more after work (I feel so professional). Luckily for me, we met in the Bar One near my work, Rex first, and then Shing and Rachel. By the time we left we were all quite merry, with Rachel catching up with us on the train here! We then staggered to an awesome Moroccan Tapas restaurant, which I couldn’t quite focus on anything, and had a nice set menu, though there was some perfume flavoured meat, that at the time I liked, CIMG0998 but in hindsight I have my doubts if I did.

On the walk back Shing and I were walking so fast, we got ahead of the Rex and Rachel, so ran into the King Edward and bolted a sambuca and got out when they were walking past. King Edward seems dope. I think we drowned in sleep at home.

Hey shorty…

In celebration of Rex surviving another year on this spinning ex-inferno, we all met after our respective works in the “cultural” centre of Stratford… stop laughing.

First time in the Theatre Royal bar, and it was jolly good, even if they did serve Caribbean food, which sometimes hurts our souls, it was actually extremely good. there was a guy playing various jazzy and poppy tunes on the piano to largish crowd. We even got him to play happy birthday to Rex, which was humourous as he had to wait for him to come out the toilet, resulting in everyone staring at Rex. He also thought it was his 21st birthday for some unknown reason.

Grinding the stones of your heart…

Work is pretty rubbish, resulting in a lapse into emo Tom, and I convinced Rex to meet me after work for a beer or two in All Bar One, which I quite like. Followed by MUSSSSSSSSSSSSSSKKKKKKKKKKKKKAAAAAAAAN in Stabford with Shing. It really is the greatest curry shop Newham has to offer, even if it is nearly always empty. Great naans.

Maybe tomorrow will be better.


Work. Tomorrow. Burn. The. System. Burn. The. Establishment. Burn.

We’ve, got these mouths to feed…

After getting up a bit late and once more exercising our faffing skillery, we poodled off into Stabford centre where we accidently fell into the Fox bar and ended up staying for around 7 cocktails due to our own insanity and vicious rumours concerning happy hour(s). We were getting nice and merry, and Katie and Jon joined us before we staggered home. Shing then made us epically awesome teriyaki  chicken, followed by a somewhat sickly but still very nice (in classic diabetes inducing style) lemon curd meringue. Unfortunately, Rex could not enjoy his time spent at the table as he was mainly losing consciousness and dying epically inside, so he had to go to bed early, at around 9.30. Via a cunning trick we made Ad stay another night. Bonus. Maybe.

Go West.

With Ad hanging around like a dead horse, we decided to perambulate off to the Westfield shopping centre while Rex was faffing around in Whitstable or somewhere equal in estuary fame. After 30 minutes on the central line, which in truth, is about 29 minutes too long on the central line we arrived in Shepherd's bush and were quite impressed with the complex of high class shops that stretched out before us. So we decided to eat. And had an awesome Greek/Moroccan or something P020109_15.38meal, where I got some meat and humus extravaganza, and Ad got a cake which had the same gravitational pull as a neutron star, which is pretty massive. I do believe the place was called Del Aziz or something equally vague. While ad was trying to munch his way through his chocolate and fruit cake, I ordered a large coffee, after which the waitress warned be about it. Turns out the mug was like 3 times the size of the mugs we have at the house, so basically a caldron. YUM.

We then shopped a bit, with Ad being awesome and helping me get a load of work stuff, mainly shirts and ULTIMATE POWER TROUSERS, from Debenhams. Overall spent about £100, and I’m sure I’ll end up wearing rags or something to work. We may have done other things today, I suspect maybe Gears of War 2. BLAM.

So you can forget....

CIMG0980 Yesterday/Today we had our most excellent New Years Party, though it was a bit slow at starting, mainly due to board games, and musical instruments and the such like. Dan, Ad and I lost dramatically at articulate, which is surprising, but not unexpected. Wait, what?

Then Dan wrote a vast essay on his current state of mind on my whiteboard while Ad bust out some blues uCIMG0983pon his guitar. In the mean time, I pondered life in the kitchen. Soon it was time for the new year, and such, and things and what your mum said u should never do unless in a tax-free constituency.  Following this, it came to my attention everyone needed to drink more, so we set about constructing a regime of rules for Ring of Fire *waves hands*. Needless to say, it was quite destructive on my soul, especially as I got the last drink in the middle card, and had to drink a pint ofCIMG0978 the most horrendous concoction of drink imaginable. After which I was close to vomitting, possibly over Hess or Dan. But I didn't. So we played again, but it soon descended into nothing, and people falling asleep. So I  decided to argue with Jason for about 3 hours about how horrendous Halo 3 is as a game, especially compared to previous games in the history of gaming. Which I think killed everyone else.
Unsurprisingly I was shattered in the morning, but Shing and Tracey made breakfast, and we tidied up, followed by Ad making an awesome thai green curry for the house fools and hess. And we got Gears 2 so started playing that, which seems quite fun but a bit like Gears 1 really. Good times.

General Ramblings and Observations by Tom of Earth: a cryptic emotionally-driven look into the life of times of the infamous sock wearer, gadget-whore, unintentional blasphemer, hypocrite, servant of Xenu, Pastafarian, absurdist and thantophobic...without me, its just aweso

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