Photo attack!!! mwahha

ever wondered what dave would look like in a lime green coat? well I havn't u lunatic...

Holy moly pudding a pie, thats a big flower, if u look closely u'll damage ur eyes... Gurny, a teddy by nature, with kung fu skillery +98, pictured here along side rex who happens to have badness skillery +100... so tracey nervously laughed as she anticipated dan's next foray into the world of photographic madness... knows it...

...unbeknowest to everyone adam was planning a quick kidnap of tracey until he was photographed red handed, "u win this one camera boi!"...

...thats right ladies.... my hair is too long...

...what zee fuck, thats windsor castle... and its like right next to Maccy D's, Starbucks, Spoons and Burger King...the fools...

...unfortunatly the club was gassed resulting in a large proportion of the club going population going to sleep...

..big fish, little fish, damn hot girl, big fish, little fish, damn hot girl...

.. and so the rex of destruction was asleep and all was well...

And so back from the land of rex

You may think, "aha! Tom is the cool and remembering to blog about his magical trip straight away" well you'd be wrong dear friend, for it is actually April the 23rd today, and I doubt my memory can remember much I'll use bullet points and see what my brain sorts out:

  • Wednesday - Cruised down to Egham in the Tom-Mobile avec ad, we cunningly didn't bother attempting to remember which way it was, however we got there and chilled avec la rex for a while, grabbed curry for dinner and then off to Medecine and the pub under it that I can't remember the damn name of. Good drinks there and then saw Dan and Tracey and we were all like "word dawgs wot be crackerlacking" and I think dan agreed to going round the world wit me andy and teh rexxor.
  • Thursday - After suppressing my desire to kill adam from his snoring shinanigans we chilled all day, had harvester for din din, then went to windsor, which was awesome place. We were walking down a road and there was like maccy ds and then spoons then star bucks and I was like.... wait a sec whats that huge building the other side of this quite small street and rex was all like "windsor castle foolio" and I was like "W00t its right in the middle of the town" and thus ended our convo and we got a coffee and went to mock some swans on the Thames. In la evening went avec dan n tracey and trish and andy and chris to Medecine for some commando and soldier night, and drank a bit but not too much but I still ended up dancing like a loon(but not a loom).. cunning
  • Friday - Woke up, was like, good adam not that bad at snoring, then had harvester again and went to the home
Wow my memory rules, now i gotta write about sommit else I can't remember... ARGH pasta.

*rocks out*

to lostprophets, u know where its at... just next to my laptop, tis nearly finished tho, might even be nicer than tesco's fruit and fibre, anyway

what I have I done recently? u may well ask yourself, tho in truth you should probably be asking me but I'll over-look that, 2 days ago did ze olde monday club at harvey, which was good fun, didn't get too drunk which was also a bonus, then yesterday went and chilled round simones to watch the arsenal game (more on that later) and fix her pc as such...

ARSENAL WON 2-0!!!! oh yes oh yes with a stick and a well prepared jelly meal on top, we played like a champion beating team, I think we're back baby...hopefully we won't blow it at juventus, fabregas is the win

lol whoops forgot I was writing this, more later I need a bath and some other cleaning device, goin to rexxors today, need to turn on my sexy

assignment deadlines:

  • Enterprise CA1: 27th April (week 39)
  • Project: 28th April (week 39)
  • Compilers CA3: 04th May (Week 40)
  • Enterprise CA2: 11th May (Week 41)
  • Modelling CA1: 11th May (Week 41
  • Presentation: (Week 41)
  • Nature Inspired CA2: 18th May (Week 42)

hey you

sexy sexy fools, its safe to say I'm in the town of orp with a can o' pork and I'm rocking your stocking. *shrugs* rhymage is my middle name... Hence I am now know as Tom Rhymage Barker-Booshank, which cunninly rearranges to spell "boobs knahsrekraegamyhrmot"....

I fear I drank too much orange juice,hopefully a pizza conconction will help, tho its not too healthy so I'll have to eat a banananananananana or sommit, damn horrible things. Even tho this week was meant to be my week of rest, I think I've got to work quite a bit, when me homeys arn't fucking shit up, tho for rest of week tis only like me,ad,ruff, simone and trev if he's cool enough. So far we destroyed the pub on friday, then bluewatered it up on sat along with a sesh of chillage at the house of ad. Rex was here as well, but he ran away now *sobs*

I think my laptop is burning the top of my desk, sure its fine tho.... this post may be quite long as I'm putting off doing any work, I may also post all my deadlines in a few minutes to help the kids. damn rex and ad finished everything apart from last exams, damn u cruel world *shakes fist like a maraca*

there's a costa down orpington now, which is pretty dope, tho I doubt its really a place to "work". oh and I forgot how much I love driving, bring it on!

Random Quote:

"I got my swagga back" - will smith...

and people wonder why I tell them to get firefox

and so off to the unknown

except its known and not quite yet. had you all fooled you little cherubs....

so pizza hut buffet, a good way to make yourself be like "hey guy I've eaten too much, where's my head" and the such like. but me, dave and louis took good advantage of it, even if I did pay for the more expensive pizza AND salad version, cos I was like, ...well u get the picture.

I got the entire series of Brass Eye recently, damn funny, also if u hadn't realised from my previous post I saw V for Vendetta yesterday, awesomely incredible film, tho afterwards I was thinking it may be promoting terrorism, but then terrorism is only terrorism if its against you/your beliefs... maybe. can terrorism be just? can dave take apart everything electrical in his room?...yes

check this crap effort at a uk Lazy Sunday, man we realllly need to do one to show them honkys whats cracka lackin'

Quick News: Lindsey Lohan wants to play Wonder Woman, Ps3 shipping region free, superman is still a dick, new game stuns world, and finally my train to orpington is at 14.10 tomorrow....

Random Quote:

"wikipedia is indeed da bomb" - raffle

Movies that make you....

..."hey guy stop dressing me up like a mail man, and making me dance for you, while you go smoke crack in the bedroom and have sex with some guy I don't even know on my dad's bed!" or "damn this is a good film"

Tom's Bestest of the Best Film List (alpha version):

  • The Matrix
  • Butterfly Effect
  • Eternal Sunshine of a Spotless Mind
  • Memento
  • Donnie Darko
  • Sixth Sense
  • Unbreakable
  • The Village
  • Fight Club
  • Snatch
  • Lock Stock and 2 Smoking Barrels
  • Batman Begins
  • Sin City
  • Kill Bill 1-2
  • Pulp Fiction
  • The Truth About Love
  • Lost In Translation
  • Back To The Future: 1-3
  • Love Actually
  • V for Vendetta
  • Serenity
  • Evil Dead 2
  • Evil Dead 3: Army of Darkness
  • X-men
  • X-men 2
  • South Park
  • Dawn of the Dead
  • 28 Days Later
(some big films I havn't seen so thats why they may not be here)


twas national bondage day yesterday according to raffle's blog, unfortunatly I missed it, I was tied up all day... haw haw, man I should be like a comedy dude or some other such function

today I 'ave been mostly lookin at tis funny

Also done some good coding so I quite happy, tho still progressing a lot slower than I would have liked, but I've boosted my morale by downloading the greatest hits of East 17....hmmm should I have admitted that?

We gonna see V for Vendetta 2moz cos we're averagely doped like that, tho we'll prolly forget, damn our eyes.

now time to go break my pc...


Futurama Returns

Futurama Returns - you knows it! you heard it here 3rd!

UPDATE: lies lies and more lies, just 4 movie/dvds instead, I think

I have a kilo of breasts!

thats right my friend(unless you're an enemy trying to keep me closer than your friends...) and an empty house, the possibilities are endless.

as u may have guessed last night we got a bit tipsy and awesomeness ensued in warehouse. parts of my jeans started hanging off (at bottom of right leg) so I went to hot bar woman and was like "hey girl you got anything I can cut this off with? jeans not my leg that is" and she was like "haw haw" and proceeded to wield a huge knife, and even cut it herself and disposed of the devil child piece of jean for me, word to her. check la photos.

do cows have breasts?

Random Quote(s):

"I can't help but feel u may have accidently mis spelled your entire blog and it was in fact meant to say "Tom rocks" or even "the tom rocks" depending on my/your/craig david's coolness. Wait no I'm just quite tipsy from clubbing, bonus points go to keith chegwin, Paula radcliffe and the guy I scared the crap out in the club by looking menacing.... to the sink for water ->"
"not sure I meant to say any of that... or any of this.... *Gaffaw* now you think I'm even more drunk that u first presumed.... you're probably right... damn... etc... and then some... more... that... maybe?... damn." - comments I left on raffle's blog :P

Photo Attack!

and so the night began once more in our hang out of choice, the ram...

...and the "who can hold their phone the longest" competition began...

...shit my hair is damn long, what happened there???...

...right so we may have turned up at warehouse a bit early.... words can describe the awesomeness of dave's expression...

...pete dancing from some crazy vantage point...

..I'm not sure whats going on here but it looks awesome

oh my days

that was an awesome warehouse, I may slightly tipsy now i've say down but me pete and dave danced like no one could see us. we had the skills, song after song came on that was awesome. then we went to the clubbing song part and some of the greatest dance songs came on.

in conclusion twas awesome, 2moz I may reflect in a more coherent way, but until then, word to my readers and all that shizzle

gee willikers batman!

I just got an email entitled : "raise ur thing 3 2 5 and galvanize your wife"... I can't imagine how for the life of me raising the jib of my crane could electricute my alleged wife, I can only suppose some sort of faulty wiring to be involved. damn electritions, the 2nd time they've foiled my plans.

this guy is awesome, has like the same views I do...can't imagine why

shy fx - Shake your body, a damn good song, I need to stop saying awesome, oh i didn't.

and I need to stop swearing its not good, I was thinking of starting a swear jar but I have like no money and it would all just go back to me (no random reader you can't have it - haw haw)...

someone took all the garfield bubbles out of the garfield comics, makes it quite a sad story about a lonely guy. cool though.

rite damn I so tired had to get up early today to go and hack up the office so I could swap some coursework that i stupidly did wrong, word to my boi stu for catching that. west syde. maybe to bed->... yeah you can join me lovely reader if you like, its a no clothe zone tho... *gaffaw*

like omg omg you guys!

check this vid out - if you seen/like/love the oc check it, tis awesome.

argh my tongue!

burnt it on some damn rice, serves me right really. luckily I got a first on my dissertation so it all equals out really... I think.

wait I just realised I don't actually have anything to say, well I did, quite a few funny things I thought of my they've fallen out of my head dammit.

Random Quote:

"my Net is playing up, as is my right buttock" - raffle, made me chuckle

check it:

Spam Stock Tracker - tracking how much money people can lose with penny stocks from spam. you knows it

apparently Hundred Reasons are playing at the Cavern, awesome. tho when I say apparently, I saw a poster so in fact they definitly are. word.

To the spa ->

did u know

a group of frogs is called an army? Rachel does so my cunning fact was uselessly put to use *grumbles* though today I managed to write Fist instead of first, tried to fix it by putting the r in and ended up with Frist... so it was all worthwhile.

I wish people would realise I don't want to buy oil stock or penny stock, or microstock. or indeed any sort of viagra alternative basically because I've managed to burn my brain out trying to work out Latent Semantic Indexing and Singular Value Decomposition. don't worry I don't know what they are either, luckily:

this dude transforms guns into guitars, cunning...

wow in the time I've been typing this post I've got 3 spams about stock, those cunning devils. I've also noticed that recently my blog has been less up-beat and sometimes quite worryingly dark in nature, with various rants and the such like, I'll try and sort that out, whoop! I blame the work ->

Random Quote
Me: This project is gonna get pretty interesting.
Capt. Malcolm Reynolds: Define "interesting".
Me: [deadpan] Oh God, oh God, we're all going to die?

it might not have gone down quite like that

Hail to the (Java) King Baby!

or not, I think I may have rebroke my project, damn. Luckily I've done a lot of cool code recently so everything is forgiven... apart from my supervisor probably attempting to kill me on thursday....s'fine

check out Davy Graham - Angi, awesome instrumental chilled out guitar track.... ffs phone not being picked up by computer, gotta restart but so can't be bothered(I wrote this bit yesterday so its not that relevant)...

we may go to the pub tonight but I'm sure that doesn't really affect any of your short-term decisions really

still no dissertation back grrr....though Arsenal beat Liverpool which was awesome, and I reckon we may have the ability not to suck for the rest of the season. yeah!

oh and today me and stu nearly told Jake that becca's sleeping with justin behind his back, but he was too busy teaching us about rendering....

Quick News: i have zero money, I need ink cartridges, I'm eating damn healthily, my hair is longer than my memory, dad's in l'hopital again, and I need the loo

Random Quote:
"...although it should be kept in mind that no conclusive evidence exists one way or the other, many contend that water is wet, the earth is round, and poking sharpened sticks into your eyes is not a particularly good idea" - can't remember where,

so unto jebadiah I said...

"hark! for hath I not blogged for a time of shortness?" to which jebadieah replied "tru dat white boi" and all was happy

so last thursday, was Stock Market night at the lemmy, to which me and dave replied "suit up!" and so we all did:

It all seemed to start so well at the ram, though with differing backstories we eventually agreed upon one

"We're international businessmen don't you know" was the phrase of the eve.
Soon stu joined us a bit later and a good drinking sesh was had in the happy hour and beyond. Bit later we decided to perambulate down le ole Stock Marketye, or something. Which proved to be much fun, I'll break it down for you lot "dope style":

All prices for drinks are displayed on a plasma screen, prices vary throughout the evening depending on the amount a particular drink is bought. So say lots of people buy carling but not that many worthingtons, carling price goes up and worthingtons go down... this is excellent as u can see from these deals we got (at varying points):

Grants Whiskey £1.50 for a double
Worthingtons £1.00
Guiness £1.00
bags of peanuts £0.10 (10p!!!)
mccoys £0.25
j20s £0.20

and other things I was prolly too drunk to remember, see Exhibit B:

who knows what stu is doing but I seem happy about it.. times are good...

oh no the dave has died! and Stu is coming on to me even stronger!!!

interesting pondered stu...

oh so they danced the night away under moon light illumoinous...

holy crap its not sunday!!

and thats the story of last thursday, I have an awesome vid of Dave and Pete dancing which I shall some day put somewhere for someone of some description to see sometime....wooo!!

h'okay so I'm back

in the rap, with a hat and bat but less of the crap. or not

so I've done nothing but work and eat, and go to a modelling workshop where again I was like mwahah I'm the win gaffaw, and jake from hollyoaks was like "er, indeed"... it might not have quite gone down like that

so check some cool dubbing

my supervisor has nicely said he wants to see our final software for thursday.... shit. shit. shit oh god oh god shit. or something along those sexy lines, it'll be fine, I'll put him off with a few casual winks, show a bit of flesh and he'll not realise what I'm showing.

oki I have a dilemma, do I finish this blog here, without some sort of suitable original awesomeness and humour, or do I strain myself to do sommit of infinite blogability that reminds you all why you read my blog? apart from my lucious locks of hair and boyish charm. see I like to be real with my readers, proper street style, I havn't sold out since I hit the big time, I'm still I'm still Tom from the Reebok.

oh another note I've spent the entire damn day with sunflower oil between my toes as I managed to spill it on my socks and on the kitchen floor, now u may suspect this to be of the erogenous nature, I can assure its more annoying than sensual. next time I'll aim for the party de la pants

right I'm off to work/sleep/clean my tootsies

Random Quote

"oh I'ma hit y'all with ya own pimp motherfuckers!" - The Jugganault Bitch!

no update, but quick note

no time now, I've gone off MSN cos I'm in a bad mood and don't wanna snap at people, plus project is pissing me off, I'll be alive later

hey you there!

Interesting Fact 7b for 6th March 2006: I have evolved not to sleep. Unfortunatly I forgot to evolve out of needing sleep. Hence nights consist of taking 3-4 hours to get sleep and then waking up every hour. May we live in interesting times.

Also who the hell called me in my Modelling lecture today? I was all like, "hey guy I can't answer this"... and the such like

apparently Lynx is useless at combating the smell of my feet. More later, now time to day-dream of sleep.

Random Quote

"ooh, typing, nice" - the last thing dave said to me

by jove!

Its the Simpsons! - but in the flesh! w00t damn u Sky *shakes fist*

UPDATE: dave found this article, apparently it was filmed in orpington! (at least the house)

oh dem cracker gon' dun it again

How you like them apples?, lonely island are the win

after that shindig of word flava, I should probably update somewhat:
things tom has been doing in the nearby past:

  • sleeping like crap (yah in the sewers, haw haw)
  • working like a hoe (without the street corners)
  • buying food of healthyness
  • failing to wake up properly
  • watching sum films
Kung Fu hustle rules, check it, Date Movie, not the win

Current Hair Status: Crazy as Duck

I booked train ticket for home time at easter for 24th March, someone remind me, cheers i only being gone for a week, cunningly for mothers day (26th fools, remember it)

Scary Movie 4 looks funny, and V for Vendetta looks a bit swanky maybe.

also I found this awesome site that gives u the answers for everything, no need to ask people stuff!

while I'm being shallow and pendantic, like this meatloaf (haw haw family guy pop-culture reference), no need to forward me chain-emails, cos I really don't think msn are gonna start charging, or that I'll die if i don't send it to 15 people, or my wish will come true, and I don't really want to be put in the position of never finding true love if I don't send this email on, cos what if my email program breaks and I'm forever cursed cos u sent it to me, I cry a bit inside *sobs*... I'm cool wit funny things tho, that don't want me to do anything

then again, its all gravy my cinnamon flavoured readers...

Random Quote

"Oh Copy SOP
oh beacon of hope to the seven cities
Please do continue the peace in the lands of Dantooine
Please do rocketh the multiverse, if you know what I mean" - a poem....from a computer science book!??!

Photo alert!

eee bi gum, it be a snowing in ex-town...

...and so we return to our home, with camera effects galore...

...soon (well on another day really but that would break the story) things turned nasty...

...and with somewhat bemused expressions....

...the tom performed his normal "I can't smile properly for the camera so I shall do a stupid face" routine...

...and to cap it off DJ Yoda and Marty Mcfly in one room, what could be better?

D wikka DJ wik wik wikky Yoda

whoa, now that was a gig and a half and a bucket of dopeness chucked all over it. totally one of a kind, DJ yoda mixed up 2 hours worth of movie clips with some hot tracks on a big screen, some highlights:

  • Back to the future Johnny Be Goode
  • Mixing Block rocking beats with eye of the tiger
  • scratching up to a jackie chan fight scene
  • some crazy film clip of 3 guys head bopping crazily in a car
loads of cool tracks, plus I got his dvd (which is unfortunatly a completely different set?!!? wtf anywya) and got him to sign it at end, dopeness in a bucket:

to the tune of

"oh I do like to be beside the seaside" in D minor

"oh I do like to be beside the toilet,
oh I do like to be beside the loo,
oh I do like to go a poo poo poo poo...." - my toilet song

unfortuantly I must resist your pleads for an encore cos I've to perambulate to campus, along with Dave and Alex... did I say Alex? mwahah course I did cos u can see I did as this is written... so I guess I didn't actually "say" .... I give up

Hi Rhys.

We went to pub again last nite, with the drink and gaffawing, not too much drunk enough luckily, right gotta go before we all die.... sl8rs foolios

hmm k I forgot to click post before I went, so its like 12.49 now and we be thinking about an English Lazy sunday come back, but we gotta learn to be funny, then dope then rap. Its all gravy hombres.

check dis shizzle

New Lazy Sunday vid, Lazy Muncie, funny.

awesomely heart warming

check it cowbois/gals

lets never mention

our quiz performance on monday, dyer wasn't the word, mainly cos thats a newcastle midfielder, but anyway. Alex is arriving from sunny spain today, wooo, what a shock he'll get it, my nipples are quite erect.... from the cold u understand, that will shock him. *sighs*

Link attack with a bat and rack of hats:
cat chicken vid
awesome handbag
whiskey tango foxtrot?
funny link for people too geeky for their own good
cool map drivin car thing w00t...

in other news.... we've booked a holiday! not before a huge amount of pain and strife due to me and nick being so young and sexy that people don't want to book holidays for us for fear of realising how unyouthful they are. the fools!

Check it, nice villa with pool and view and castle on a mountain. how can it go wrong? oh yeah we're booking everything seperatly and I gonna be driving a renault megane scenic... do they have lampposts in spain?

Went to modelling workshop today, owned everyone somehow tho don't really know how, prolly doing something on a pc that they said it don't work on *rubs himself* furthermore I bought 4 cornish pasties.

Random Quote

"The average woman consumes six pounds of lipstick in her lifetime" - fhm fact-orama

General Ramblings and Observations by Tom of Earth: a cryptic emotionally-driven look into the life of times of the infamous sock wearer, gadget-whore, unintentional blasphemer, hypocrite, servant of Xenu, Pastafarian, absurdist and thantophobic...without me, its just aweso

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