There is a old chinese proverb, "A Tom be drunk when aftershock is on the wings of a glass"... and it was true...
...as ruffle agreed whole heartdly with his cunning hat of thinkage....
...*gaffaw* replied adam with a quiet intrigue...
..hark!, my legs upon the table of drunkard gathering! (2 microwaves and some sorta board thing)...
...oh god a headless nick!... wait a tick is that a nappy?..
.."what?, have I got something on my face?" correlated Tom...
...."argh" pondered Nick "I seem to have an invisible baby upon my shiny head"...
....*sniggers* numpty...
...The ever fearless Mike attempted to drink beer through the Hat of Justice and Valour and Carling...
...and the after effects were devestating..
..the most incredible photo of arena ever created...
..."heeeeeyyy", retrofied Pete with his best Fonz impression...
...suddenly the nite got blurry as the glasses piled higher and higher...
..."oh gosh" exclaimed an exuberant Nick " my blood to alcohol ratio is rather nifty"...
..."indubitbl...indubeti...ind...yes" flozzled Pete...
...."Grr and I be like Hardcore Porn" sobbed Tom...
..." my what a long finger you have Pete" jizzled Nick...
...ahh student humour, there is no higher form of wit...
...holy crap! what did u do pete... wait why do I have glass inmy ass!!..
...we have starbucks! parteh! verb like....
...wtf mate, I seem to have dented my mp3 player, Crikey!!!!!!!!
Random Photo Alert!!!!
Dave's Birthday fun
Totally hectic night overall, feeling highly bad today,
twas dave's birthday as u may have guessed, and what better way to say woo than to give him a box full of crickets! and of course alcohol and general chaos devices....
Then it was off and onto pub golf, which probably was an error, as soon drunkardness had set in amazingly well. A final ending of us makign everyone in new spoons look scared and bit like. and I started complaining about them not giving me water and saying i was gonna die on the spot!.
Damn good fun though, except not feeling great now.
UPDATE: oh wait just remembered after everything, me pete chloe et dave started jumping on each other and tables and things from microwaves in front room. This soon resulted in the table (which was makeshift luckily) smashing, along with glasses and plates, and Tom (me!) getting glass in my arse and bleeding lots, and other injuries occuring. Much much fun!
Tom's Sandwich Recipe of the day:
(top to bottom)
1 slice white bread
4 Fish Fingers
Sliced Tomato
1 slice white bread
Sliced Lettuce
Medium Curry Powder
Sliced Corned Beef
1 slice white bread
result = yum
cunningly...
not too much drunk yesterday even though it was monday club, well done to me I think u'll understand. Ruffle b-day today! woooo, he saw strippers yesterday, even though they didn't know there was gonna be strippers there!
on other news, Tesco Fruit and Fibre (only 98p) is awesome! as is there 500 sheets of printer paper for 48p?!, compared to uni shop which is 3.60, glad I shopped around. Also The very super mega best of Now Dance is an awesome album go out and get (prolly buy) it!.
Dammit I need another bowl of fruit and fibre... I need to go to the library so I appear less lazy than I actually am, maybe I'll just read my sexy book on modelling animation.
I've not...
...drunk for 2 days, surely this is some sort of human record? freshers squash tomorrow, sounds like a plan.
I must sleep for death surly creeps.
That is meant to say surly, its poetic u heathens.
Tv shows galore
ARgh so many shows, Family Guy and American Dad are awesome as usual, and worryingly Simpsons have actually created a good episode, by a new writer, bit family guy style 1703 fools.
Lost is incredible as always, though 202 is a bit slow. new Smallville took days to get but was worth it, aWEsome!
still got joey to watch and be watching the oc, but I gettin bored of oc cos other stuff so good and its all a bit depressing.
craig david all over your flip floo
or sommit, k so I been lazy again, mike blew up our router and we couldn't get a stable net connection.
Lots of stuff has happened, everyone's here now! We played lots of squash, lots of drunkard shinanigans, we broke our door so we could kick it open, but thats fixed. While doing this our door bell flew across hall, so we tied wires together and posted it through stu's letter box and ran. Much funny. Me and nick went down some secret path and ended in someone's back garden and had to run from a security light. Freshers Arena was more packed than the party in my pants, at 9.10!!! luckily we hacked vip tickets by texting them. We went to new spoons like every day for 2 weeks. And I bought a bottle of Smokey Jims which is interesting.
Bulliet Bourbon is the most amazing bourbon ever, try it fools... very smooth. I keep ringing random people when I am drunk, so sorry, stu/ad/russ/anyone else. I have not confessed my love for anyone yet, apart from maybe mike/nick/dave, so its all good.
Oh and my bank account is lower than my jeans and we got told off for gettin on someones roof near walkabout, but damn we missed the wurzels. Freshers Squash tomorrow!
Drunkardness = homoeroticism for some reason.
CatchPhrase of Culverland Road: "To The Bar!"
light sabers and phones to boot
Well I promised you light sabers and thats what u'll get.
I went to bed at some sorta decent time and I'm thinkin of going to the gym this morning before I run out of energy. Dammit why are there tampons everywhere.
Also my phone seems to have some sort of magnet inside it which attracts damage. Starting to get so battered now, I might just forget the case I bought, cos the few times I take it out, I get drunk and it falls and chips and stuff. All very distressing. I may get a 512mb memory card for it as well, bout 45 quid these days.
Brekkie time, though I'll put some clothes on first don't worry.
Also, Nick was spanking me yesterday with a large foam device, I think this was due to my excellence at our new cricket/stone throwing hybrid game. Which involves throwing stones at a person with a plate, who then has to hit them and yada.
some are like
"hey I'm dar"
other people are like "damn we got drunk last nite, knocked on stu's door, scared matt who lives there, threw ice cream at banners in the high street and turned exeter into a city of disrepute"
other people are this these people who manage to create a linux based hand held console thats better than the DS and PSP combined, for only 124.99 and it runs for 6-10 hours on 2 AA batteries!!!!
Last nite
twas awesome! I shall break it down for u homeys... I got drunk.
We started in rileys playing pool, with stu there, who I thrashed soundingly at pool, twas 4-2 in the end, though the alcohol had got to me at that point, otherwise would have been 5-1 obviously. Then once we ran away from stu, we skipped down to where the place is with the fish in it, but we got scared cos we're not posh enough, so we went in urban surfer, which was awesome to watch the world trundle by. Then off the spoons, where we drank lots and talked random crap for a lot of the time. Then we went to some crazy pub across the road, where we made to much noise and were lucky we didn't get chucked out really. Following this we all went "dar" and went to kfc where we ate all their hot wings and we had to bargin with them to get some cool crispy ness... man i love kfc
Following this we went home and I harrassed spuddle for a while, and talked to ruffle on my phone for so long it overheated and turned off.....Thats a lesson to all u k750i owners who talk while charging.
In other news, I'm a bit damp, and I hope nick don't come in cos I'm mostly naked... best to get some clothes on.... oh and I think I'm marrying Jade with mike and nick has bridesmaids. I think Dave may be jealous of her.
my hand hurts from typing now - oh and people stop sending emails to my hotmail, I barely ever use it! Use my Gmail, if you don't know it ask.
Shizer
oki oki oki
oki dammit I gonna start this again, however I'm so out of date and u know me I'm more lazy than a rasher of bacon in mexico... yeah work that out... so he's bullet points of blah blah blah oh god there's a penny....:
- Been to Exeter twice in car! with loads of things, and lots of poolage! Me and dave frolocked, followed by Mike and Nick frolockin avec me
- Louis has ringworm and some other disease that makes skin go like that dude at the end of robocop. bonus.
- Went to Hasting with the orpington posse, much good fun, even though I was hungover
- Drank way to much Aftershock with Dan most days.
- Had a HUUUUUGE curry with ruffle and adam, where lots of grease was injested, twas awesome
- Was put to slave labour building a path, woo
- Finally came down to Exeter permanetly, where we've done very little and just sat watchign tv and drunkin bevies
in other news
you'll all be glad to know there's a new killer mega stab-you-in-the-head-with-a-blunt-boomerang su do ku.... I don't really care but I quite liked the boomerang reference.
Howz dat?!
very nice thank you....
we play cricket today on proper pitch and all, I can bowl pretty alrite, but batting is a kinda lucklusta affair of me just being able to wack it, and not direct it, and hence nearly taking down Mark. Excellent fun.
Saw Crash at the moving pictures. Twas pretty good, but if u don't wanna see it here is a basic summary of the message behind it, broken down piece by piece its still quite complicated:
"Everyone is racist"
on a more happier note, check out the mmorpg: http://www.anarchy-online.com/ if u sign up before 15th Jan, its free free free free, cos they got a system of advertising boards running advert clips, very clever. Also my bitorrent of it is going nearly 200kb/s, and its only 800mb. How erogenous.. sleep now for packing 2moz
finally a catch up
My god!, look how much my "laser" mouse has damaged my desk, an utter disgrace...
Loads of stuff happened this weekend:
Friday: Went to pub, me ruff rex got there at 6, I had some crappy salad, we then proceeded to get highly drunk, with people joining us for the ride, colin got there at 8! Awesomely awesome night, though me and colin don't remember dan walking home with us, and when he got in he was randomly talking to his parents. His mum went out to hall and was like "why the fuck is there a cone here"... which he forgot he brought in, excellent. Rex also threw up flourescent yellow in the morning!
Saturday: Went to Rachel's, awesome much wikked, cool drinking games, and food, and we frolocked in stupidly hot pool, which scratched me and colin up, but not rachel... suspect if u ask me. We also managed to drink 60 bottles of bud ice between a very few amount of us, and weren't drunk!. Awesome
Monday (2nite): Went and frolocked down goddington with a tennis ball and football, practised bowling, got cricket fever. then went to pizza express, yummy, and followed by Sexing up spoons once more. Adam showed up so birthday type wooing.
List of Cool Songs:
Ben Folds - Landed
David Powter - Bad Day
Oasis - Importance Of Being Idle
Jack Johnson - Good People
Element 80 - Scars (The Echo Song)
Eagles - Take It Easy
James Blunt - Beautiful
sunshine, don't bend my heart dooby dooo
I thought this was quite cunning
as is this
I can't be assed to do a real post, too sunny, sl8rs foolios
interesting random thoughts....
I was reading my floral book for 3d modelling today, and u have to wonder about computer science humour:
"This artificial tilting of the surface normals is called, amusingly, perturbing the normals."
i mean wtf?
I was also thinking (thought not at the same time), that surely channel 4 have nothing to lose streaming off their site as all the money they make is from adverts anyway? Its prolly illegal cos of licence n wotnot. but basically I wanna watch cricket on my computa. damn their eyes.
for anyone whose gonna buy a laptop for uni, heres...
WHY LAPTOPS SUCK:
1. they are well expensive
2. they are well slow
3. keyboards are shit on them
4. u can't upgrade
5. not much power goes to them for extra usb devices
6. can get lost down sofas
7. can get eaten easily by peckish friends
8. if stuff spilt on keyboard, whole thing fuxxored
on a related subject I'm not sure why when I search for "Daniel Powter bad day", one of the videos that comes up is "rate my anal spray"
Check this fools - Mr T rules
Random Quote:
"damn my camel has spilt Horlicks on my lappy whilst i was out- BAD BAD CAMEL" - Ruffle
Love, Dolphins & Sex shops
In the depths of the Amazonian Rainforest, there's a tribe whose basic language has no concept of "love". Therefore I was wondering, does love just exist because someone once said "hey, we need something to enslave people with" and someone (probably called Brutus) was all like up in your face and said "ya blud, lets make love....ew get away from me (ahem)". Or, is love - not the platonic kind felt for your mother etc. - a built in "feeling" within humans, and not just a way to justify sex without a purpose? On the other hand, is love all that differs use from other animals (apart from religion, and killing of each other etc) or can animals feel love. I'm sure dolphins can, but then again maybe they just like fish a bit obsessively, and transfer that to humans/dolphins/things that have fish. Same goes for dogs. Not that dolphins eat dogs. Or dogs eat fish.
What I'm really trying to say is. isn't my blog a lot more boring when I try to be deep and meaningful...
in other news, check out the japanese sex shops
also check these lucky folk
new shoes?
on the conclusion of my shoe looking like this...(hey its my foot!)...
...I have purchased these shoes for the princely sum of 35 sterling each... how excellent
saw the island yesterday, twas pretty good. wanna see dukes of hazard for jessica simpsons ass next week. We had cool curry club at lloyds bar before hand, which was pretty dope, got a free cobra avec it.
on another note check out Google Desktop 2, there sexy search majig, but this time with a sexy side bar... though is only sexy if its on auto-hide. Expect microsoft to copy this soon.
Also google have Google Talk now, a very very very plain instant messanger, with voice over IP, communication. yet it seems a bit pointless, does no more than msn, and a lot less.
Lost....
Current Episode To Watch: 21
only one that hasn't finished downloading...nrgh...even have 22-25...nrgh....
Current Level of "Lost" Addictiveness: No response to external stimulae, EEG shows heightened cerebral activity
BBQ ala da rachel
a highly captivated danu...
and more meat than u can shake a stick at...
awesome bbq nite, I think I managed to eat about 20 kebabs, on top of like loads of burgers, crisps and sausages. Excellent. Lots of Bud Ice as well and chillage. We watched some silly Van Damme film as well, which was about as clever as I am smart....
no food for tom today I suspect...
Current Level of "Lost" Addictiveness: Delta waves moving from cranial anterior to posterior
The Venue
amanacer, wooo..
...with lighting effects of excellence...
...and acousticness of sensualness...
...followed by the regulatory slapping of adam...
...to which rex was like, "wtf mate?"...
...and what the hell is happening here?...
so we went clubbing in la London, dans la Venue. Twas pretty good, but kinda bit empty and music was a bit odd. Plus I can't remember how to dance which is a bit of error. Mike u gonna have to teach me again. Drinks were like 3 quid each, and Pints of 4x were like watered down piss.. damn their eyes. Luckily we decided to get N47 home, which involved walking halfway to Lewisham, still I had meat and chips and we frolocked along. I think dan kissed rex at some point. Amanacer were good though.
Current Level of "Lost" Addictiveness: Spacial Awareness And Depth Perception Lost
the meet up ala Sarah
rack 'em up [insert random joke] ..
...adam with the concentration of a jack rabbit on ritalin...
...and once more I'm being laughed at *sobs*
me and me homeboy ad went to Sarah's gaff to be like "sup girlie, 'appy Birthday". We went to la walkabout, which was pretty dope though steak wasn't quite as big as I'd have hoped. Then we went to rileys and played a vast amount of pool, in which 1) I didn't suck completley at and 2) the place is awesomely nice there.
Current Level of "Lost" Addictiveness: Speculating Nervous Twitches
don't call me lebunentta
- dammit, can't wait to see Serenity, reading up about it etc, gonna be so awesome, may watch the FireFly episodes again *rubs himself*
- Bones - new series with David Boreanaz in, mite be good
- How I met your mother - new series with Alyson Hannigan in, wooo
- Kitchen Confidential - new series with Nicolas Brendon... prolly gonna be pants
- Four Kings - new series with Seth Green, he's normally in good stuff, so mite be good
- caught a bit of Lost other day, looks awesome, shall download.
- James Marsters gonna be in a 6 episode arc in smallville!! awesomeness!!!!
Also apparently new buffy DVDs are selling faster than Shrek 2 and Sharktake, mwahhaah
In other news, I went to the gym today, and thats about it. wooo
UPDATE: remember to get Arrested Development, the 4400, mebbe Battlestar Galactica and Entourage as well, to see if they be good
an appointment of doom
Okay so after all the palava about my heart etc here's how my doctors appointment went, broken down stylie:
*enter Tom Stage Right*
Tom: Sup mr doctor
Doc: Lo tom, u suck, whats wrong?
Tom: er, my heart be broken Mr dude.
*doc slaps heart/blood pressure device on tom*
Doc: shut up f00lio, u be the win, go away
Tom: But er, fast heart no?
Doc: no u blankety blank - Look take this blood test if u want but tbh ur hearts good, but ur the suck, get outta here - damn exeter rufians.
Tom: Arsecakes...
exactly, anyway also they all seemed to hate me cos I had to be a temporary resident cos of exeter tomfoolery?! what a waste of time.
Sounds like a time for monday club really...
finaly... wtf?
bbq extravaganza
shockingly a group photo was created, even though their was quite a fallic savaloy in it...
ah computer games, is there anything they can't do (answers on a postcard to PO BOX IDONTCARE)....
..adam after finding out I was not in fact in love with him....and after puttin on rexxor's glasses...
...the real contents of burgers!
excellent weekend, apart from me throwing up extremely violently on the friday nite, but still much good, alcohol, food, frolicking etc. I think overall I ate my weight in meat. I think we left ruffle's place quite a mess :( sorry ruffle!
Mashed is an awesome 4 player ps2 game, very addictive as well.
Awesome weekend, now to dance.
pass the pork fool
I wanna buy this poster I think, anyone find it cheaper than 5.99?
today I've mostly been trying to find websites with ppl from skool on, and failing drastically, do u lot do nothing at uni/work etc?! fools. All i found was some football team that was created in like 98 that must be dead by now.
Luckily today its the start of mega ruffle bbq of mega doom and awesomeness weekend. Even colin's coming back from his Intel headquarters, so basically expect much of this, this and this.
for all u neighsayers...
Here is proof that I do actually do something productive with my day - in this case I am reading Principles of Three-Dimensional Computer Animaton by Michael O'Rourke
However also, here are my 29/43 so far Things - anyone got any more suggestions for moi?
I've just realised that also I'm never gonna be able to be a child acting protégé (rachel showed me how to spell that, cheers!), which therefore means I won't be an awesome superstar in america, or be able to date Lindsay Lohan. dammit. I gonna end up being some "network supervisor" or sommit, in which I get to drive a Ford Mondeo, instead of a Mclaren-Mercedes SLR. bum clouds.
I'm running outta time to be a rockstar as well, would help if I could play the guitar. Or sing. or play the drums. even more arsecakes.
In lighter news, england seem to be hitting a ball with a wooden stick pretty well, and are currently on 193-2, in their first innings. oh wait 194 now. funtabibble
ooh ya
so I decided i was too lazy to go the gym woo.
I really should do some comp sci, hey check this car
anyone seen my microphone? I can't find it... darn
ifIwasanirishsailorwoowoo
wow that was awesome, anyway saw Herbie today, for some reason I thought it was awesome, maybe just cos lindsey lohen was in it. Man I'd invite her to the party inmy pants, but then again ur all invited! wakka wakka woo woo yeah
if I knew what the hell is going on here, then I'd be a better man...
damn u firefox stop crashing! - FUCK A DUCK just lost my entire post, lets see if I can redo it....
http://www.onewordmovie.ch/ - check it, click Movie Window, make sure u have shockwave and play, tis quite interesting.
Oh I completed San Andreas, gonna do random stuff on it now, and I think I've forgotten how to type, which is pretty annoying, sleeptime.
Random Quote (happy go lucky emo quote)
Have another drink and drive yourself home.
I hope there's ice on all the roads.
And you can think of me when you forget your seatbelt,
and again when your head goes through the windshield. - Brand New
awesome
in reply to Simone's mom's advances on me, mr dave ala hardcore says:
"thats amazing! ur a regular dustin hoffman!!"
not quite how i'd put it, but excellent reply anyway :P
erm yes...
there is a small chance that there is something horrendously wrong with my heart, I gonna book a doctors appointment 2moz to make sure that I'm just being paranoid.
excellent
damn u father give back my fan!
however, let us not get distracted, especially as I am very sweaty from the gym.
hey! I made this jingle:
who woulda thought, that what I once bought
wasn't a catapillar, but a local miller
who said hey you, have this pink poo
to which I replied, oh dear my hat is died
Thank you Thank you, in further news dan's station is under lockdown due to a bomb scare, luckily he's not in it at the moment.... argh my firefox nearly died but I saved it with this handy util: Process Explorer - it's pretty excellent
Random Quote:
"no, ill suddly drunken myself and say heeloooooooooooo" - Nick-a-trick
hey, thats... cool
I have decided to award nick the award for best Blog URL, tis rather excellent:
http://www.nickohyeahbudoomp.blogspot.com/
dammit now I gotta change my blog template, anyway, me and stu came up witha cunning plan to take out the dude that charged be 104 quid. It involves robots with mini EMPS and a lot of hacking and DOS attacks
luckily we can't be assed.
Stu's quiz of sucking ass
Cool game of fun
just realised I not done an ep of Yesense for a while! shock horror
btw everything at far2narf is back up except the ExFlow Vid, so erm, I gonna try and find sommit to do which is cunning
fucking plebs
okay so far2narf.co.uk is dead and down cos I exceeded my monthly limit by 3.4gb?! (limit is 1gb) and he's charged me 104 quid, the fucker
so no vids are up or anything, I not sure how it got so far over as they supply no way of keeping track and they are quite fucking shit.. dammit...
anyway, awesome bbq weekend, we hacked up some guitar shops in london, then proceeded to simone's bbq extravaganza, where simone's mum was very drunk and just a tad scary! Luckily we had beer and ruffle soon turned up for much drunk hilarity.
no mroe energy to type... must... sleep..
shock news from the Far2Narf Productions camp!
since the release of the highly successful ExFlow video, a rival studio (current name unknown) has released a video called ExBlah, which in the same hard hitting style as ExFlow, delivers laughs and cheese.
so my good man, Far2Narf Productions sees your ExBlah and raises you a Mike Dance Workout!!
Thats right children for a limited time only (until the internet dies) view it at Far2Narf Productions!
-----
in other news Adobe Premiere is quite cool, and well... I went to the gym?... *sighs* wooo
death is all around us wooogoogog
ah, well I've discovered I am indeed highly scared of death, here's the back story:
recently had some dreams which involves someone who has something similar to the "evil dead" inside them, and they go around with an axe throwing it and people, if u get hit the evil dead is transfered to u and the previous host dies. These may sound like nightmares, but its normally quite fun dodging axes while carrying on with normal dreams, anyway however this time for some reason Amy Firmin had it, and we went down a blocked end and it hit me in the head.
anyway I was about to hit someone with it (think it may have been dan, sorry man) when I suddenly realised I was gonna die, and the shock and terror I got from that, I woke up within 1 second, and nearly smashed my head on the wall. I've never in all my life woke up so quickly from a dream. Awesome.
Exflow time!
That's right children to video is finally available! Basically its collection of videos combined cunningly together from the first year (that I did ages ago), mainly parcour silly stuff. I think some of you seen it woo... anyway cos I'm mean i'm gonna make u get it from the Far2Narf Productions site................
oh also its 80mb.....well worth it though
Far2Narf Productions
shit! just checked my telescope, looks like the power rangers planet has explodemanated!!!... damn i'm good. oh and the lack of stars is due to a special space phenonium* called.. er... tomforgottoaddstarstothebackgroundfirstwibble...
I was looking through my telescope the other day, and not only was I like "wtf I don't have a telescope", but also I was like "whoa that planet there looks like the Power Rangers planet, though quite similar to something shoddy i could make in photoshop..."
so I got bored, and I thought, i wonder what would be an interesting outlet for my creativity, then I just decided to sketch Jennifer Love Hewitt....
