Caffeine Rambles #1

You see, the plan that I had devised was to sit in this sinful supplier of caffeinated beverages and write about days gone past. However, the cognitive effort required to access such remote regions of my synapses is well beyond my warm sleepy state. I'm sure, however, I can come up with some form of babble with which you can improve your mood with, perhaps only in the thought that you're not trapped inside my mind like I am

For instance, I was pondering what speed my inner monologue is, not the subconscious number, logic and thought crunching brain activity, but the scrubs-esque layer of consciousness that ponders thoughts such as this. By which I mean, is it talking speed, or reading to myself speed or faster? Unfortunately, I forgot why this was necessary or interesting to conern myself or my lovely readers with.

I find it odd that my watch doesn't possess the functionality to keep track of the date. Then again, I rarely remember I have a watch that can supply me the time, so it's more a fashion accessory. Except I often am concerned I look like I'm showing it off as it's quite big and obstructs my sleeves, leaving it in full view. Then again I don't care too much.

My recruitment agent took me out for lunch, because he likes the bulge in my package. To clarify, that's Far Cry 2 and Star Wars Force Unleashed that I got far too cheap. And to clarify that, I mean my penis. There's some humour to be found in the "cheap" comment, but anyway. Yes, agent, lunch. He did this lovable gesture as I managed to get a job he flung me at.

*Waits for the gasps and fainting to subside*

That's right kids, your friendly neighbour hood bum has obtained some form of contractual obligation to provide a service in return for monetary compensation. And Bupa. And Life Insurance. And 23 days paid holiday. Unfortunately, it wasn't with the financial software house in the Gerkin, but with a really cool company near holborn. And I got them to let me start in Jan, so I can possibly travel for a couple of weeks. More later.

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General Ramblings and Observations by Tom of Earth: a cryptic emotionally-driven look into the life of times of the infamous sock wearer, gadget-whore, unintentional blasphemer, hypocrite, servant of Xenu, Pastafarian, absurdist and thantophobic...without me, its just aweso

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