Reasons my phone sucks

I've had this phone a year now, and I can cunningly explain all the things I think are wrong with it and why I want a n93 or maybe an n80 if I'm impatient

• The joystick has a life-time of about 5 months. Its shocking quality, half the time it won't go in some directions, or thinks u've pushed it in. V.Bad - well known problem
  
• It can't stand the wear and tear that I inflict upon phones, my previous nokias have taken it, unfortunatly my K750i is more battered than a chip shop fish.
• Half the time my phone's memory isn't recognised by my pc untill I restart, I don't know if this is my pc's fault, but my friend has this trouble as well.
• Operating system is very limited, compared to Symbian mobiles it is extremely basic, for my uses, tis not good enough
• My charger requires lots of wiggling to get it to actually stay charging, connection is poor.
• Does not support many formats.
• Photos take a shocking amount of time to taken, even with macro mode off its very hard to capture split second moments of things
• In-built browser is aweful - if Opera-mini wasn't around I'd barely use wap.
  

NB: this may not be for all k750is but its from my experience. K750i is not a bad phone as such, it has a HUGE amount of good features, just its very annoying and for me not good enough.

Holy stinking feet batman

wasn't expecting that when I sat down, shoulda left my shoes on

Enterprise Exam: Holy crap that was pretty bad, but I may have scraped something that could keep my marks back. Luckily I got marks back from coursework, got 83 and 78(avec dave). So that pwned the socks off what I was expecting. thank you miss yu Ping Pong.

Unfortunatly the exam then made me feel I needed to reward myself...by watching way too much My Name Is Earl. And then today iwas just lazy. I did discover though that the solution to my revision troubles are : 1) Don't be near a pc 2) Revise on my own.

Other wise distractions run rampent.
Not long left kids, only 8 days. Then I'm unleashed upon the unsuspecting world... except I now told it.... if it reads my blog....which it prolly doesn't....cos it doesn't have any eyes....that I know of...oink oink

little do people know this

but I'm actually fantastic...


no wait, I meant the other thing...


er....


oh yeah, under-prepared.

National Coffee Stained Jeans Day

you know your revisions going badly when your're a student and your well up with your washing. Can anyone explain to me why I chose Enterprise Computing? Exam = 2moz. Whoop

Money Making Scheme v4:
1.Cat
2.Box
3.????
4.PROFIT!!11!!1!!!1!one!!11LOLz

anyway no time to frit away typing random things of wit, to the dramallamamobile

And so a round up

Well this is quite a "surge" of posts I do believe. Funtastic

So I went to town and didn't bank on it being a bank holiday.... haw haw. next.

A number of bloggable thoughts occured to me at the time, firstly Marks and Spencers is pretty awesome, even if it is run by a bunch of emo kids. There food seems damn awesome, and all made themselves, no brands, which could be good, or could be bad, tis quite novel to me (shows how much I paid attention when I used to go in there avec mum).

Also I found another gap in my knowledge, while navigating the small food court in M&S I was trying to find some spice and came across this sign:


now if i was clever, like you splendifious reader, I'd know the exact definition of one, even wikipedia doesn't really help me as it doesn't tell me what the hell it means in the UK. Needless to say there was no spice there....


I not sure why I took this photo, but it kinda shows people crowding outside waiting for Tesco to open. Quite sad really. Obviously I was also waiting there.

Finally a shout out to the girl in Sainsburies who was cute and wished me a nice day. Word'izzle

A Smattering of Beer Offers

Sainsburies:

2 for £16 on Stelle (20x284), Carlsberg Export (20x300), Kronenbourg (20x300) and Carling (24x330)

Carlsberg £9.99 (20x440ml)

Bud £10.99 (20x300)

Tesco:
Fosters £13.98 (24x440)

Carlsberg £12.98 (24x440)

For a probably more comprehensive list check here (moneysavingexpert.com)

as i'm typing this...

i am in fact in cafe nero on my phone... what may surprise you is the fact that their coffee is damn nice though molten hot. And as if on cue a hot girl sat down and i proceeded to spill coffee all over my leg. Smooth. No doubt as dave pointed out, they were all probably like "dang that guy's leg is hot" or some other such wittiscm... to the shops ->

you're all probably wondering

why art I up at this crazy time, and already showered and shaved expertly. Well my loyal readers its down to two main factors:

1) Saturn has passed the Jupiter Nebula and fallen in Uranus... haw haw
and 2) ARHG I need to revise

In other news mr scruff rules, some property chillaxing ninja tunes, with a touch of cut'n'paste thrown in dj yoda stylee

right I can't be dilly-dallying on here I need to work, away with thee!

as a quick update

I 'ave been mostly revising. currently on campus. soon home for lunch woo.

Dave got an n80... grr. I bit jealous, though kinda wondering what I would really use it for more than this phone. Wifi is nice, except well only place i can access it is at home... where I have a pc anyway. Does have a nice camera and display tho, pondersome.

some dude just walked past me who seemed to be wearing eau de dentiste... grooby.

In further news I'm bored of banana thereoms now. New topic: why did trev ring me asking for rachel's new number when in fact his girlfriend is her sister. A tangled mass of intrigue and confusion. I'd normally say to the bar... but currently, "to the Cellular Automata"....

Oh and I saw X-men 3: The Last Stand last night, extremely awesome, though people had mixed opinons on it. I still loved it. Wolverine is a legend and well, don't really wanna spoil it for anyone...

"I'm the Juggernaught Bitch!

the ripening rate of bananas

while perusing a number of papers on Cellular Automata and Evolutionary Programming for analog circuits, I began pondering bananas. I happened to be eating one at the time.

This made me ponder why this banana was relatively green, even though I bought the bunch a few days earlier, this led me onto this theory:

If we take the assumptions:

1) Fruit in general ripens faster if there is other riper fruit around
2) Bananas of the same bunch tend to be at the same state of "ripeness"

we can conclude I'm a bit of a dick. Not just this but also that:

The ripening rate of a singular isolated bunch of bananas is approx. exponential. This theory is based on this imaginary case study:

If we imagine a bunch of bananas as some sort of Swarm. We can then give each banana some sort of individual localised behavior. i.e:

if nearest neighbour ripeness is > than own ripeness then increase own ripeness by a randomly weighted amount relative to the difference.

From this the emergent property of the swarm system should be that when all bananas have low ripe-ness the rate should be low, then possibly a momentum of "ripenessing" should build up, hence an exponential rate of ripening.

Either that or I just proved they ripen using a linear equation. Whatever, we can safely say it still stands that I'm a dick.

This is awesome!

totally incredible mosiac thing with photos that is like continous, I dunno how they manage to do it on the fly, awesome

it would appear that

Lara Croft is not flame resistant, she's useless that girl.

My head hurts today, i don't seem to sleep properly anymore, bar footsie 2nite tho, so that should = pain, whoop. shit not done any revision... to town ->

Answer this riddle if u will

If there once was a man with hand of spam, where was the candlestickmaker when the baker was cheering the lakers?

and so

I arrive home... at 8.45am, I'd be a pretty dope night shift worker

still, bonus points to stu for being on campus for going on 45 hours now, rather him than my knee

right I gonna shower then sleep or sommit along those lines, whoop de woo

if I was to tell you

I was still up on campus and had done very little from when I last blogged would u believe me? well you should cos I wasn't lying. dammit it sux, why can't I work.

In further news ant colonys get really boring at 3am in the morning, however eating, drinking and walking around aimlessly seem highly attractive options. If I'd actually worked during the day this may have all been avoided. probably not though.

[insert more complaining here]

quite a dilemma has occured: should save my last pound for a red bull alternative or use it for 2 packets of crisps... the jury is out... prolly nice and tucked up in bed

Shout out goes to Norah Jones

Guess what kids?

thats right I'm back on campus doing a late nighter, hopefully not an ALL nighter but we shall see how much I work, slightly demotivated due to laziness and the fact that FUCKING ARSENAL LOST in bad circumstances. We battled hard, and everyone put their ickle old hearts into the game, but didn't help lehmann got sent off in first 18min.... error. and referee was bit pants

Back to the work dilemma, well its not a dilemma more of a "I'm lazier than someone nailed to a hammock" situation. Notice the use of procrastination once more. down with teh system I say, and with spelling of the word the.

Random Quote

"Lets engineer some arrays kids!" - meh

Holy shit spangles batman

I'm really bad at blogging these days, must be the hats.

What have I been up to? I'm glad you asked a huge range of... work. but i did my demonstration for my project and Wendy was like "Hey guy you be the sex" and Ed was all like "that be good my prodege" and then I clicked a node with 2 documents in. Cunningly these 2 documents were "Penis" and "Sperm" so I chuckled, Ed chuckled and I couldn't face Wendy.

Twas grooby tho, now just 1 piece of work to do then Exam revision, weeeeeeeee or wii as I think I am obligated to say these days. Stuff needs to happen more I've decided so I have an incentive to blog and the such like, I did have these thoughts last nite tho:

How I Met Your Mother is good but I suspect it has put its foot in it completely because basically when Ted actually does meet his wife to be the show is so gonna Jump The Shark. This then got me thinking about the nature of the show, and that there isn't actually a huge onslaught of jokes and they are mostly around Barney, its kinda like a lazy kid throwing a few stones when he can be assed but sometimes a huge rock (stick with me here). a show like Friends on the other hand is like a kid whose got ADD throwing smallish stones all the time, where as a show like The Green Wing is like an anti-aircraft machine gun. Basically, yeah.

Breakdown of a night on campus

I decided to let you all into the secret of not dying while doing an all nighter on campus. so to begin:

The Setup: I'm in the "Yellow Room" I need to write many pages by 10.30am tomorrow, current total : 1 or 2 lying around. I'm logged into a yellow room computer with houdini (3d modelling thing) running on it and I got my laptop hacked into the network next to me for typing the write up on. They're sharing a file space. I also have my mp3 player and a large bottle of Kick. oh and a blazing headache from caffiene withdrawel

So far what has occured (as of 21.07): I've dilly dallyed a bit, chatted to gavin and ollie in red room, rendered a few screenshots and fannyed around. I've also gone to vending machines and the loo about 5 times. Next on adjenda... ajenda... schedule is to grab some SOP network screen shots, u knows it.... more to follow

21.28: Mapped my project space to a network drive, taken half of SOP network screen shots. Woo. Pain in head and eyes suddenly repaired, caffiene and taurine levels must be at a normal level

21.45: caffiene levels dropped slight ache in forehead, gavin came in, attempted to help him with enterprise, failed drastically, so went to loo. need to finish sop shots. Damn.

22:01: it would appear everytime I close Houdini it crashes. no matter I've done all the SOP shots now. MP3 player ran outta battery, luckily my experience taught me to bring a charger. Time to write about modelling the bike, good times.... not before getting some water, damn caffiene makes me thirsty. Current Music: Jose Gonzalez

22:22: Done some screen shots of various stages of bike could be a bit easier than I anticipated, tho more time consuming, damn them all to places of smell. I need to loo again, I may have another Vitamin C tablet to help rid the evil Stu Virus

23.25: Done just about nothign more, bit of writing. My homeboy Pete came up and we chilled for a bit, then I got an expresso and my head blew off, so I chilled with Gavin while I measured the angle of my shakes. Not good. Time to get some water and ACTUALLY DO SOME FUCKING WORK... yes

01.13: Still not done much work which is bad, got distracted again by going to engineering vending machines with Gavin and DAve. oh yeah dave's here. We chilled there with drinks and food for a bit on the sofas, which we discovered not to be working really. Error. Current Music: Norah Jones

02.13: Blitzing work at the moment, you maythink that I'm procrastinating on here but I just proud of my work speed. Either I workin really fast or the caffine has sped up time. Damn. My heart and tummy aren't feeling 100% kosha but nothing bad, I'm in la zone and Frankie de Tori wouldn't say. Dave been here for a few hours helping people, not sure if he was meant to do any work up here?

02:36: Currently I'm a bit like superman. I won't tell u why but its not cos I think I piddled myself..... Vending machine has run outta crisps! In related racing news I've nearly done writing up how i modelling each bit, just the dude to do. mmmm nice.

3:55: Still going strong my loyal readers, I suspect large quantites of water help, and also provide a much needed break to keep going to the loo. I'm on shaders now, very boring, sux. Also I just got attacked by mothra in the toilets, not a pretty sight but we'll leave it at that. *ponders* 6.5 hours till hand in... easy...just no sleep

4.52: Well it would appear that the caffiene fell out, but then pepsi max swooped to the rescue, unfortunatly no money left so its all I can manage. I finished shaders but still got stupedly masses to do, such as animation, rendering, post-production and yada. Still need to print as well obv

5.53: and durka my durka its all done, parteh parteh parteh, except not cos gotta go back and print it now. DAMMIT. no rest for the wikked wikked wile wile west, jim west, desparado.. etc. so enter the caffiene insanity mode. Luckily dave has his car..... lets hope sleepness is not an ish. Damn we still need to sort out enterprise, not home time yet.

6:56: back in the shack with a rack of mack... wot? anyway printing loadsof stuff, dave gone to sleep for a few min while it prints, I don't feel tired yet which is good, I think caffiene is sending its last shockwave through me, I may shave, be careful my younguns

07:25: printed everything out now, it appears I have around 40 pages for modelling including all SOPs and screen shots.. possibly more I can't be assed to count! I suspect soon time to wake dave, dammit I don't wanna sleep I not tired and I gonna waste a beautiful day, DAMN U COMP SCI...ah well...

07:58: done and dusted. a successfull night of working I do believe, now sleep.... oh by the way. its my birthday....

"Super Power" training center

Boing Boing: Those wacky Scientologists are to open a "Super Power" training center in FL

u may also call me Hat Master John

Joss = the legend

Joss Whedon or is he?

its one of those times again

when I really need to work but I feeling I can't be assed. Year 1 and 2 Tom would just give up now and go get drunk/steal a kitten/sell drugs to the kids down the imp. Year 3 Tom will complain vigoursly on blog and force himself to work even though it feels hopeless. Down with the system. Up with the caffiene.

*notes he's procrastinating on blog* shh now Tom.

not only is it

way too early to post but my stupid brain made me wake up at this time, before my alarm could even think about going "ting a ling ping". Also I woke up with huge pain in stomach, which I suspect is due to caffiene content in me. good times.

Current Modelling Status: I have a bike, a partially finished dude and a partially finished street. I was on campus from 9am till 10pm yesterday doing it. my eyes arghghghh wibble. Can't do it on my pc cos it blows up spectucularlly.

Hair Status: starting to get so long its started to consume my head.

gonna have a shower, if I can think of anything awesome to say I will tell thee it... damn all I can think of is I REALLY bleeping need A haircut

to the campus ->

a little ditty I freestyled

"yo mikey j
I'm here to stay
I got long hair
and erm, I'm not a bear"

and that was that. What have I been up to you may ponder? well I shall relieve you from this blah blah. Friday nite went to new spoons avec la girlies, and I got a baloon! whoopa, then after that trekked to meet the hombres at The Ram, more drinking ensued, came back, was like "Stu, get on up over here" so we again watched crappy quiz shows with beer till 3am. then Dave was all like "to the tesco" which was nice, in end sleepage occured at 6am, error.

Saturday night -> Stu house party, much drinking occured, and I still had long hair.

Work update: I finished my project! whoopa, and enterprise, now just got modelling, corba and nature left. and zero time to do it in. sux

try orbox B tis a slightly addictive flash game

Two pints of lager and a packet of crisps is an awesome show fools

actually a piece of mud in the shape of jeremy beadle... further details later on this breaking story

slam dunk the funk

have you noticed the content of my blog has dynamically decreased in value since I've been drowning in an ever deepening pool of work?

I have, and I plan to improve the situation... just not yet.. but some day my young ruffins I will defeat Time and multiply it by a factor of Xenu.

I also need some sleep, to the red bull ->... or other generic energy drink

For all those Code Monkeys out there

Jonathan Coulton - Code Monkey

For the dark lord Xenu...

I REALLY hate Tom cruise:

Cruise to eat babies placenta

tho actually in his defense (hmm) he was quoted out of context or some shit
Cruise plays down 'placenta plan' (bbc)

this is what didn't happen when me and AndrAia didn't take on Tom Cruise, or sommit blah blah, wibble

Why I hate Scientology and Love South Park

"In Scientology doctrine, Xenu (also Xemu) is an alien ruler of the "Galactic Confederacy" who, 75 million years ago, brought billions of people to Earth, stacked them around volcanoes and blew them up with hydrogen bombs. Their souls then clustered together and stuck to the bodies of the living, and continue to cause problems today. " - Wikipedia on Xenu

"So, Scientology, you may have won THIS battle, but the million-year war for earth has just begun! Temporarily anozinizing our episode will NOT stop us from keeping Thetans forever trapped in your pitiful man-bodies. Curses and drat! You have obstructed us for now, but your feeble bid to save humanity will fail! Hail Xenu!!!
-Trey Parker and Matt Stone, servants of the dark lord Xenu." - South Park Creators

finished enterprise

death pain anguish

a conversation I had recently

Me: yo man
The World: hey bro, whats cracking
Me: Nowt much, just hangin, u?
The World: sweet same man same, wanna play a game?
Me: sure Monopoly?
The World: nah how bout The Game Of Life
Me: sure man, wait let me just take this call...

Me: hello
Julie: heya, hows life?
Me: Its me against the world baby...

Le end... its been a weird day...

Let there be work and there was work

"argh" said Tom to God "for you have smitten me with more work than a mere mortal can finish" to which God replied "Snakes on a Plane"

now this is funny:

20 Years of Neighbours

and for my next trick

I shall introduce you to the wonderful world of Google Calendar

which has just been released and its incredibley awesome beyond any other calender thing, boo ya

further more I need a new graphics card, argh

I be teh smellage in the diskoteque

but no worries hombres. Have u noticed that u always manage to do the most stupid things when there's a hot girl nearby? I have, for instance pouring the contents of a bottle of water into your right lung, and then attempting not to cough or choke before subtly exiting the vicinity. I survived luckily, ah well, snakes on a plane.

recently work still been on la agenda as u all suspected I fear - holy crap I left my pasta boiling while I was in the shower... to the clothes applier!

ah its fine, now gotta wait for it to cool so I can quickly fridge it and then go to campus till late, then see Ice age 2 2nite, woooooooo, or some such expletive, honk.

time to write the post thats actually before this one, hawhaw

Profound thoughts of the moment

"Inferring is only obvious in the eye of the inferer" - gramatically shocking

"Nice guys finish last, but at least we can see your ass from here" - less profound

alert in a skirt!

not really but it rhymed, anyway this post is not for technophobes!.. i.e. its techy and full of links

check out OpenTopia, its catalogues or something masses of webcams and randomises them for you, tis pretty sweet

check out µTorrent, its old news but although I love Azureus dearly as a bittorrent client and it has the post features, it is made in Java. which therefore = resource hog, µTorrent on the other hand is faster than my master in a plaster.

for anyone who is new to bitorrenting, these are my 3 best sites for getting stuff, in no particular order: ISOhunt - miniNova - thePirateBay

btw downloading copyright stuff is STEALING, its bad, I do not condone it, u may go to a place that has norty ppl there... like St Pauls Cray... ooh I went there... to confuzzle the authorities a tad use PeerGuardian 2 - it stops people of authority from connecting to ur pc, tho they can still get ur IP address they can't collect evidence.

hmm this is turning into a bittorrent (wikipedia) post, though to be fair I'm sure dave could point you in better directions but that lot is from my cunning experience....anyway further techie stuff:

the municator looks cool, its a tiny pc that has 40gb hard drive, runs linux does loads of stuff and things, sites a bit jank but google it sugar.

check out I-RAM its a pci card which can have up to 4gb of ram dimms plugged into it, and can act as a hard-disk... allowing UBER quick windows boots (vid)

final few links for some people out of the "know" (all free):

• OpenOffice.org - awesome FREE microsoft office alternative that I use as default now
• fireFox - the best (imho) browser out there, STOP USING IE..
  
• Opera Mini - the best (wop) browser for java phones, it is awesome. get it. there normal browser is damn good as well
• sick and tired of msn messenger having ads? well hack them out of it here
• Eclipse - if your developing java, its the best IDE u can use, much useful - plugins for other languages as well
  
• a video you downloaded not working? get the klite codec pack - still not working? download VLC
• use limewire? try FrostWire its exactly the same but removes any blocks that may be used in the future
• download a dvd or cd image? don't mess with nero, download Daemon Tools best in the business for mounting images on virtual drives
• bored of Task Manager and its crapness? get Process Explorer tis much better and u can search for handles if files get caught up in processes
  

thats the end of my completely made up as I go along tech post, note: this is my opinion of some decent apps out there, there are loads more i missed and yada yada yada,

love y'all

another brother slain...

R.I.P. Jasper "Jazz" Smith

In memory to the best dog I ever knew I've released the Jazz The Super Dog lyrics.

and so the saga continues

you may be thinking "why hasn't the great and fantastic person that is Tom posted anything on his blog for a while?" well he prolly has but ur looking at this blog instead of his, foolios. Anyway work yada yada yah

In other news I've become totally addicted to Reboot, which is annoying as there's only 4 episodes left and then I'll have watched them, people gotta get them, they so awesome and funny. Loads of computing terminology (not that that's cool) used as everyday words and so many parodies, like Evil Dead, X-files, Indiana Jones etc There's even a musical recap at the end of season 3

so I've decided I've got the 3D modelling bug, and I gonna FSU for my modelling project. Plus sometime in my spare time I wanna model all of reboot so I can do some mini eps or just sommit to look cool.

Recently I've been eating mega healthy which is good, apart from lettuce keeps fecking freezing in the fridge, not a good look. Tho I been gettin up at like 7-8 in the morning every day which is impressive all round, I did flake out at 9.45 or something last night tho, error.

Finally I had a dream last night Iwas in a zoo, but it was a special zoo for animals with tourettes...which was odd and even I was confused in the dream. Though then a big spider jumped on my neck and I was like grrr... there was a dolphin involved somewhere.

Profound Thought of the Moment:

"If we spend all our life living, doesn't that mean we spend all our death dying?" - a less profound thought by me

interestingly

Freddy Flintoff, or as some people decide to call him "the post man that looks a tad like Freddy the Flintoff" was wearing a Daniel Powter hat today. Now the vexing ponderment that poses is, is he Freddy Powter or Daniel Flintoff? I suspect Freddy Powter but the odds are stacked against him...

and thats enough.

Profound Thought of the Moment:

" if we spent our entire lives thinking twice about everything, we'd only do half the things" -moi

h'okay so

I nearly posted a totally stressed out post last night about how work sucks, and I can't do enterprise at all, and its basically something I CAN'T DO.... turns out I can, or at least more than I thought I could, this arvo shall reveal more... however I'm still behind schedule, down with the system!

I've developed an unhealthy obsession with ROFLCOPTERS!!!11!!!!one!1!! which is bad, and prolly not to0 elite these days, on a relatively seductive note check out Imogen Heap, she's awesome musik artist...

I've still gotta blog about awesome trip to rexxors but I rushed off my feet at mo, what with waking up at 7, going to bed at 10.30pm, going to the gym, eating healthy, and working like a mofo...

and so I return

in a blaze of hair and more hair, and I just deleted 9gb of music, giggady giggady...

~ROFLCOPTER!!1!!! check this out

more later, must sleep. w00t

Photo attack!!! mwahha

ever wondered what dave would look like in a lime green coat? well I havn't u lunatic...

Holy moly pudding a pie, thats a big flower, if u look closely u'll damage ur eyes...

..meet Gurny, a teddy by nature, with kung fu skillery +98, pictured here along side rex who happens to have badness skillery +100...

...as so tracey nervously laughed as she anticipated dan's next foray into the world of photographic madness...

...you knows it...

...unbeknowest to everyone adam was planning a quick kidnap of tracey until he was photographed red handed, "u win this one camera boi!"...

...thats right ladies.... my hair is too long...

...what zee fuck, thats windsor castle... and its like right next to Maccy D's, Starbucks, Spoons and Burger King...the fools...

...unfortunatly the club was gassed resulting in a large proportion of the club going population going to sleep...

..big fish, little fish, damn hot girl, big fish, little fish, damn hot girl...

.. and so the rex of destruction was asleep and all was well...

And so back from the land of rex

You may think, "aha! Tom is the cool and remembering to blog about his magical trip straight away" well you'd be wrong dear friend, for it is actually April the 23rd today, and I doubt my memory can remember much I'll use bullet points and see what my brain sorts out:

• Wednesday - Cruised down to Egham in the Tom-Mobile avec ad, we cunningly didn't bother attempting to remember which way it was, however we got there and chilled avec la rex for a while, grabbed curry for dinner and then off to Medecine and the pub under it that I can't remember the damn name of. Good drinks there and then saw Dan and Tracey and we were all like "word dawgs wot be crackerlacking" and I think dan agreed to going round the world wit me andy and teh rexxor.
• Thursday - After suppressing my desire to kill adam from his snoring shinanigans we chilled all day, had harvester for din din, then went to windsor, which was awesome place. We were walking down a road and there was like maccy ds and then spoons then star bucks and I was like.... wait a sec whats that huge building the other side of this quite small street and rex was all like "windsor castle foolio" and I was like "W00t its right in the middle of the town" and thus ended our convo and we got a coffee and went to mock some swans on the Thames. In la evening went avec dan n tracey and trish and andy and chris to Medecine for some commando and soldier night, and drank a bit but not too much but I still ended up dancing like a loon(but not a loom).. cunning
• Friday - Woke up, was like, good adam not that bad at snoring, then had harvester again and went to the home

Wow my memory rules, now i gotta write about sommit else I can't remember... ARGH pasta.

*rocks out*

to lostprophets, u know where its at... just next to my laptop, tis nearly finished tho, might even be nicer than tesco's fruit and fibre, anyway

what I have I done recently? u may well ask yourself, tho in truth you should probably be asking me but I'll over-look that, 2 days ago did ze olde monday club at harvey, which was good fun, didn't get too drunk which was also a bonus, then yesterday went and chilled round simones to watch the arsenal game (more on that later) and fix her pc as such...

ARSENAL WON 2-0!!!! oh yes oh yes with a stick and a well prepared jelly meal on top, we played like a champion beating team, I think we're back baby...hopefully we won't blow it at juventus, fabregas is the win

lol whoops forgot I was writing this, more later I need a bath and some other cleaning device, goin to rexxors today, need to turn on my sexy

assignment deadlines:

• Enterprise CA1: 27th April (week 39)
• Project: 28th April (week 39)
• Compilers CA3: 04th May (Week 40)
• Enterprise CA2: 11th May (Week 41)
• Modelling CA1: 11th May (Week 41
• Presentation: (Week 41)
• Nature Inspired CA2: 18th May (Week 42)

hey you

sexy sexy fools, its safe to say I'm in the town of orp with a can o' pork and I'm rocking your stocking. *shrugs* rhymage is my middle name... Hence I am now know as Tom Rhymage Barker-Booshank, which cunninly rearranges to spell "boobs knahsrekraegamyhrmot"....

I fear I drank too much orange juice,hopefully a pizza conconction will help, tho its not too healthy so I'll have to eat a banananananananana or sommit, damn horrible things. Even tho this week was meant to be my week of rest, I think I've got to work quite a bit, when me homeys arn't fucking shit up, tho for rest of week tis only like me,ad,ruff, simone and trev if he's cool enough. So far we destroyed the pub on friday, then bluewatered it up on sat along with a sesh of chillage at the house of ad. Rex was here as well, but he ran away now *sobs*

I think my laptop is burning the top of my desk, sure its fine tho.... this post may be quite long as I'm putting off doing any work, I may also post all my deadlines in a few minutes to help the kids. damn rex and ad finished everything apart from last exams, damn u cruel world *shakes fist like a maraca*

there's a costa down orpington now, which is pretty dope, tho I doubt its really a place to "work". oh and I forgot how much I love driving, bring it on!

Random Quote:

"I got my swagga back" - will smith...

and people wonder why I tell them to get firefox

and so off to the unknown

except its known and not quite yet. had you all fooled you little cherubs....

so pizza hut buffet, a good way to make yourself be like "hey guy I've eaten too much, where's my head" and the such like. but me, dave and louis took good advantage of it, even if I did pay for the more expensive pizza AND salad version, cos I was like, ...well u get the picture.

I got the entire series of Brass Eye recently, damn funny, also if u hadn't realised from my previous post I saw V for Vendetta yesterday, awesomely incredible film, tho afterwards I was thinking it may be promoting terrorism, but then terrorism is only terrorism if its against you/your beliefs... maybe. can terrorism be just? can dave take apart everything electrical in his room?...yes

check this crap effort at a uk Lazy Sunday, man we realllly need to do one to show them honkys whats cracka lackin'

Quick News: Lindsey Lohan wants to play Wonder Woman, Ps3 shipping region free, superman is still a dick, new game stuns world, and finally my train to orpington is at 14.10 tomorrow....

Random Quote:

"wikipedia is indeed da bomb" - raffle

Movies that make you....

..."hey guy stop dressing me up like a mail man, and making me dance for you, while you go smoke crack in the bedroom and have sex with some guy I don't even know on my dad's bed!" or "damn this is a good film"

Tom's Bestest of the Best Film List (alpha version):

NOT IN ORDER

• The Matrix
• Butterfly Effect
• Eternal Sunshine of a Spotless Mind
• Memento
• Donnie Darko
• Sixth Sense
• Unbreakable
• The Village
• Fight Club
• Snatch
• Lock Stock and 2 Smoking Barrels
• Batman Begins
• Sin City
• Kill Bill 1-2
• Pulp Fiction
• The Truth About Love
• Lost In Translation
• Back To The Future: 1-3
• Love Actually
• V for Vendetta
• Serenity
• Evil Dead 2
• Evil Dead 3: Army of Darkness
• X-men
• X-men 2
• South Park
• Dawn of the Dead
• 28 Days Later
  

(some big films I havn't seen so thats why they may not be here)

apparently

twas national bondage day yesterday according to raffle's blog, unfortunatly I missed it, I was tied up all day... haw haw, man I should be like a comedy dude or some other such function

today I 'ave been mostly lookin at superdickery.com tis funny

Also done some good coding so I quite happy, tho still progressing a lot slower than I would have liked, but I've boosted my morale by downloading the greatest hits of East 17....hmmm should I have admitted that?

We gonna see V for Vendetta 2moz cos we're averagely doped like that, tho we'll prolly forget, damn our eyes.

now time to go break my pc...

Owned

Futurama Returns

Futurama Returns - you knows it! you heard it here 3rd!

UPDATE: lies lies and more lies, just 4 movie/dvds instead, I think

I have a kilo of breasts!

thats right my friend(unless you're an enemy trying to keep me closer than your friends...) and an empty house, the possibilities are endless.

as u may have guessed last night we got a bit tipsy and awesomeness ensued in warehouse. parts of my jeans started hanging off (at bottom of right leg) so I went to hot bar woman and was like "hey girl you got anything I can cut this off with? jeans not my leg that is" and she was like "haw haw" and proceeded to wield a huge knife, and even cut it herself and disposed of the devil child piece of jean for me, word to her. check la photos.

do cows have breasts?

Random Quote(s):

"I can't help but feel u may have accidently mis spelled your entire blog and it was in fact meant to say "Tom rocks" or even "the tom rocks" depending on my/your/craig david's coolness. Wait no I'm just quite tipsy from clubbing, bonus points go to keith chegwin, Paula radcliffe and the guy I scared the crap out in the club by looking menacing.... to the sink for water ->"
and
"not sure I meant to say any of that... or any of this.... *Gaffaw* now you think I'm even more drunk that u first presumed.... you're probably right... damn... etc... and then some... more... on...to that... maybe?... damn." - comments I left on raffle's blog :P

Photo Attack!

and so the night began once more in our hang out of choice, the ram...

...and the "who can hold their phone the longest" competition began...

...shit my hair is damn long, what happened there???...

...right so we may have turned up at warehouse a bit early....

...no words can describe the awesomeness of dave's expression...

...pete dancing from some crazy vantage point...

..I'm not sure whats going on here but it looks awesome

oh my days

that was an awesome warehouse, I may slightly tipsy now i've say down but me pete and dave danced like no one could see us. we had the skills, song after song came on that was awesome. then we went to the clubbing song part and some of the greatest dance songs came on.

in conclusion twas awesome, 2moz I may reflect in a more coherent way, but until then, word to my readers and all that shizzle

gee willikers batman!

I just got an email entitled : "raise ur thing 3 2 5 and galvanize your wife"... I can't imagine how for the life of me raising the jib of my crane could electricute my alleged wife, I can only suppose some sort of faulty wiring to be involved. damn electritions, the 2nd time they've foiled my plans.

this guy is awesome, has like the same views I do...can't imagine why

shy fx - Shake your body, a damn good song, I need to stop saying awesome, oh i didn't.

and I need to stop swearing its not good, I was thinking of starting a swear jar but I have like no money and it would all just go back to me (no random reader you can't have it - haw haw)...

someone took all the garfield bubbles out of the garfield comics, makes it quite a sad story about a lonely guy. cool though.

rite damn I so tired had to get up early today to go and hack up the office so I could swap some coursework that i stupidly did wrong, word to my boi stu for catching that. west syde. maybe to bed->... yeah you can join me lovely reader if you like, its a no clothe zone tho... *gaffaw*

like omg omg you guys!

check this vid out - if you seen/like/love the oc check it, tis awesome.

argh my tongue!

burnt it on some damn rice, serves me right really. luckily I got a first on my dissertation so it all equals out really... I think.

wait I just realised I don't actually have anything to say, well I did, quite a few funny things I thought of my they've fallen out of my head dammit.

Random Quote:

"my Net is playing up, as is my right buttock" - raffle, made me chuckle

check it:

Spam Stock Tracker - tracking how much money people can lose with penny stocks from spam. you knows it

apparently Hundred Reasons are playing at the Cavern, awesome. tho when I say apparently, I saw a poster so in fact they definitly are. word.

To the spa ->

did u know

a group of frogs is called an army? Rachel does so my cunning fact was uselessly put to use *grumbles* though today I managed to write Fist instead of first, tried to fix it by putting the r in and ended up with Frist... so it was all worthwhile.

I wish people would realise I don't want to buy oil stock or penny stock, or microstock. or indeed any sort of viagra alternative basically because I've managed to burn my brain out trying to work out Latent Semantic Indexing and Singular Value Decomposition. don't worry I don't know what they are either, luckily:

this dude transforms guns into guitars, cunning...

wow in the time I've been typing this post I've got 3 spams about stock, those cunning devils. I've also noticed that recently my blog has been less up-beat and sometimes quite worryingly dark in nature, with various rants and the such like, I'll try and sort that out, whoop! I blame the work ->

Random Quote
Me: This project is gonna get pretty interesting.
Capt. Malcolm Reynolds: Define "interesting".
Me: [deadpan] Oh God, oh God, we're all going to die?

it might not have gone down quite like that

Hail to the (Java) King Baby!

or not, I think I may have rebroke my project, damn. Luckily I've done a lot of cool code recently so everything is forgiven... apart from my supervisor probably attempting to kill me on thursday....s'fine

check out Davy Graham - Angi, awesome instrumental chilled out guitar track.... ffs phone not being picked up by computer, gotta restart but so can't be bothered(I wrote this bit yesterday so its not that relevant)...

we may go to the pub tonight but I'm sure that doesn't really affect any of your short-term decisions really

still no dissertation back grrr....though Arsenal beat Liverpool which was awesome, and I reckon we may have the ability not to suck for the rest of the season. yeah!

oh and today me and stu nearly told Jake that becca's sleeping with justin behind his back, but he was too busy teaching us about rendering....

Quick News: i have zero money, I need ink cartridges, I'm eating damn healthily, my hair is longer than my memory, dad's in l'hopital again, and I need the loo

Random Quote:
"...although it should be kept in mind that no conclusive evidence exists one way or the other, many contend that water is wet, the earth is round, and poking sharpened sticks into your eyes is not a particularly good idea" - can't remember where,

so unto jebadiah I said...

"hark! for hath I not blogged for a time of shortness?" to which jebadieah replied "tru dat white boi" and all was happy

so last thursday, was Stock Market night at the lemmy, to which me and dave replied "suit up!" and so we all did:


It all seemed to start so well at the ram, though with differing backstories we eventually agreed upon one

"We're international businessmen don't you know" was the phrase of the eve.
Soon stu joined us a bit later and a good drinking sesh was had in the happy hour and beyond. Bit later we decided to perambulate down le ole Stock Marketye, or something. Which proved to be much fun, I'll break it down for you lot "dope style":

All prices for drinks are displayed on a plasma screen, prices vary throughout the evening depending on the amount a particular drink is bought. So say lots of people buy carling but not that many worthingtons, carling price goes up and worthingtons go down... this is excellent as u can see from these deals we got (at varying points):

Grants Whiskey £1.50 for a double
Worthingtons £1.00
Guiness £1.00
bags of peanuts £0.10 (10p!!!)
mccoys £0.25
j20s £0.20

and other things I was prolly too drunk to remember, see Exhibit B:

who knows what stu is doing but I seem happy about it.. times are good...

oh no the dave has died! and Stu is coming on to me even stronger!!!

interesting pondered stu...

oh so they danced the night away under moon light illumoinous...

holy crap its not sunday!!

and thats the story of last thursday, I have an awesome vid of Dave and Pete dancing which I shall some day put somewhere for someone of some description to see sometime....wooo!!

h'okay so I'm back

in the rap, with a hat and bat but less of the crap. or not

so I've done nothing but work and eat, and go to a modelling workshop where again I was like mwahah I'm the win gaffaw, and jake from hollyoaks was like "er, indeed"... it might not have quite gone down like that

so check some cool dubbing

my supervisor has nicely said he wants to see our final software for thursday.... shit. shit. shit oh god oh god shit. or something along those sexy lines, it'll be fine, I'll put him off with a few casual winks, show a bit of flesh and he'll not realise what I'm showing.

oki I have a dilemma, do I finish this blog here, without some sort of suitable original awesomeness and humour, or do I strain myself to do sommit of infinite blogability that reminds you all why you read my blog? apart from my lucious locks of hair and boyish charm. see I like to be real with my readers, proper street style, I havn't sold out since I hit the big time, I'm still I'm still Tom from the Reebok.

oh another note I've spent the entire damn day with sunflower oil between my toes as I managed to spill it on my socks and on the kitchen floor, now u may suspect this to be of the erogenous nature, I can assure its more annoying than sensual. next time I'll aim for the party de la pants

right I'm off to work/sleep/clean my tootsies

Random Quote

"oh I'ma hit y'all with ya own pimp motherfuckers!" - The Jugganault Bitch!

no update, but quick note

no time now, I've gone off MSN cos I'm in a bad mood and don't wanna snap at people, plus project is pissing me off, I'll be alive later

hey you there!

Interesting Fact 7b for 6th March 2006: I have evolved not to sleep. Unfortunatly I forgot to evolve out of needing sleep. Hence nights consist of taking 3-4 hours to get sleep and then waking up every hour. May we live in interesting times.

Also who the hell called me in my Modelling lecture today? I was all like, "hey guy I can't answer this"... and the such like

apparently Lynx is useless at combating the smell of my feet. More later, now time to day-dream of sleep.

Random Quote

"ooh, typing, nice" - the last thing dave said to me

by jove!

Its the Simpsons! - but in the flesh! w00t damn u Sky *shakes fist*

UPDATE: dave found this article, apparently it was filmed in orpington! (at least the house)

oh dem cracker gon' dun it again

How you like them apples?, lonely island are the win

after that shindig of word flava, I should probably update somewhat:
things tom has been doing in the nearby past:

• sleeping like crap (yah in the sewers, haw haw)
  
• working like a hoe (without the street corners)
• buying food of healthyness
• failing to wake up properly
• watching sum films

Kung Fu hustle rules, check it, Date Movie, not the win

Current Hair Status: Crazy as Duck

I booked train ticket for home time at easter for 24th March, someone remind me, cheers i only being gone for a week, cunningly for mothers day (26th fools, remember it)

Scary Movie 4 looks funny, and V for Vendetta looks a bit swanky maybe.

also I found this awesome site that gives u the answers for everything, no need to ask people stuff!

while I'm being shallow and pendantic, like this meatloaf (haw haw family guy pop-culture reference), no need to forward me chain-emails, cos I really don't think msn are gonna start charging, or that I'll die if i don't send it to 15 people, or my wish will come true, and I don't really want to be put in the position of never finding true love if I don't send this email on, cos what if my email program breaks and I'm forever cursed cos u sent it to me, I cry a bit inside *sobs*... I'm cool wit funny things tho, that don't want me to do anything

then again, its all gravy my cinnamon flavoured readers...

Random Quote

"Oh Copy SOP
oh beacon of hope to the seven cities
Please do continue the peace in the lands of Dantooine
Please do rocketh the multiverse, if you know what I mean" - a poem....from a computer science book!??!

Photo alert!

eee bi gum, it be a snowing in ex-town...

...and so we return to our home, with camera effects galore...

...soon (well on another day really but that would break the story) things turned nasty...

...and with somewhat bemused expressions....

...the tom performed his normal "I can't smile properly for the camera so I shall do a stupid face" routine...

...and to cap it off DJ Yoda and Marty Mcfly in one room, what could be better?