I left myself some very cryptic clues as to what I was up to today, apparently some form of pain was had, which I can only imagine was brought on by alcohol, so whatever I did participate in the previous day must have involved some laughable shizwaz. Needless to say we got a roast. I'm not sure how, possibly via a public house.
I don't really remember. There was some walking involved apparently, and my back. Or we came back. WAIT! I remember. I was in Reading. We did some walking which was awesome, amongst canals. And I felt like jank. And threw up lots. And the roast was nice. And something. The photo of the canal is in the last post as my continuity is messed up. A little bit. Anyway....
When I arrived back at the house, we waited a bit, then Nina came back, made us awesome pasta, possibly with sausuage, as it was her last night here, or in fact she left that night. We drank various wines and substances, before sleeping soundly.
THERE WAS AWESOME CHEESECAKE AS WELL!
Don't shout.
It turns out
Reading with friends
Not the verb but the place, you fools! HA HA. Anyway, after some day time tomfoolery, much of which I cannot remember, I drove my lovely car down to the abode of Kirsty, and after some confusion outside her house, I knocked and she lived there and all was right. Cracked open the beers, and young Joffery arrived, and we hugged, and kissed, and anal sexed, and everyone was happy, and 
Kirsty had some good footage. Waited until Kirsty's friend, Hannah, got there, and we cracked out some pizza and garlic bread. A few more beers and gin later, and we grabbed a taxi into central reading, for a fancy cocktail in a bar, where we pwned the bartender with a animated gif that Ad sent me of someone doing "you mum". Excellent.
Moving swiftly on, we found a public house, and began drinking in earnest, though pretty quickly 
the girls got swarmed by guys in the cockfest that was O'neils. After a few bevvys, and sitting down, amongst loads of firemen swarming round the girls, some guy the size of the Tower of London, wanted to arm wrestle me, though not too threatening, just pissed and wouldn't shut up. So I was like "sure, thrash me, whatever", well 10 minutes later he still couldn't win, and I'd got him further down than he got me (ahem) anyway, and so we both agreed a draw, and he was like d'oh. Anyway....
Next we moved on to a rockie pub for emo kids, and the such, and Hannah, Joff and I chilled on a sofa watching the kids go by as Kirsty "chatted" with a fireman friend. Eventually we exited, Hannah got a cab home, Joff and I ate some awesome burger and chips, while Kirsty and Martin (the fireman), admired the architecture of the nearby Cathedral....
Joff and I capped off the evening by sharing a cosy double bed. Yum.
Tufts of retinal scanning
The past few days have been inconsistently existential. On Wednesday, I saw the worst film ever created by anyone, anywhere, called The Romance of Astea and Caledon, or whatever. I got paid £55 for it though, still shit. Thursday and Friday probably involved a mixture of wasting my life, watching shows, washing up, cleaning, cooking, and doing your mum over and over in the back of a Clio. I don't think I even know anyone with a Clio. On the Friday, Raffle came back, so our house's energy flow finally become balanced.
On thursday I spent the entire day cooking a steak and mushroom pie, including veg, from my book. Twas pretty epic, I got away with doing many things wrong, such as not having enough time for cooking, and cooling down, as it would take 6 hours altogether, and I took about 2 hours, but it was all good. Threw it all together in a pie, then I had far too much pastry left over, so threw our very old eating apples in a pie, and laughed manically at the foolishness I used, including the wrong type of flour, sugar, lack of butter, and possibly other quandaries. Pie was surprisingly good actually, and we had it with waffles. Apple pie was alright, it had an awesome pastry apple design on top, but the use of eating apples wasn't perfect. I was quite proud of myself though. Pie was for dinner on friday as well. KABLAM.
Mouse
I discovered we had a mouse. Aptly named it craig, then proceeded to construct a humane mouse trap:
Your Mystery Messiah
So the BFI turns out to be an awesome place and we should really go here many times over. Wonder if they have an RSS Feed of showings. It helps I'm being paid to drink beer, eat baguettes, and watch films though. And I'm in the heart of London. I may hit up the tate modern later on, as I'm cool and artie like that, apart from not having tight clothing.
Did you knpw I'm currently avoiding getting a job? It's most excellent. And I think it might be the time to unleash Brick on Rex tonight. HOLY SHIT! Forgot to add Brick to that list of DVDs I want. What a silly man I am.
The Thames is damn awesome, and according to Rex, is surprisingly non-polluted. Apart from the bodies of his victims obviously. Talking of large scale massacres, I'm developing a habit of holding a pen in a very "special" manner when I write, as it feels more comfortable. Must stop. I need to get back into reading, Charlotte would be epically disappointed in me. I should at least finish 'A thousand Splendid Suns". Now that's a good book title.
In other brain thoughts, though lightly filled with hypocrisy, I'm starting to like alcohol less, in some cases it's all fun and games, but I worry about our social and cultural reliance on it. Especially as a social lubricant. It's all humourous at Uni to drink your face off everday but it's starting to lose its 'cool' factor, and the underlying emo-esque messages are falling more into focus, especially when it's used as an escape. I think clarity is a virtue to be cherished, if you still have it.
If we're going all emo, I have also decide that empathy, at least over-active empathy, is a burden to people who have it. And that is all I'm to say on the matter.
Finally, my life is empty and hollow without those tectonics.
London is my only fuel.
Things I Did Today
- Booked Fall Out Boy and Death Cab For Cutie tickets
- Posted a variety of letters
- Did some serious washing up, as opposed to my normal jovial washing up.
- Put out rubbish
- Cleaned bathroom designation #1.
- Rang the landlord to find there is a man who will fix our mould, and the water pressure will increase, and we weren't meant to get this house, as he told the letting agent not to rent it to us, by the fools didn't listen or something and made a binding legal contract. HA.
- Moved hoover downstairs.
6 DVDs I want:
- The Nines
- Juno
- Disney's Robin Hood
- Disney's Jungle Book
- High School Musical: Encore Edition
- High School Musical 2: Extended Edition
UPDATE 2: oh and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles!
Today we have mostly been roasting
In fact we made toad in the hole, though we did use pancake mix, which is apparently blasphemy on facebook, either way, we ate toad in the hole with stuffing, roast potatoes and veg, plus awesome gravy, and they didn't. Epic win. We also finally got to meet zena, Shing's friend, and then watched Vantage Point, rex's suspiciously obtained film from malaysia. Was very good, well done team. Shing and zena also made some crazy carrot cake, that looked like it had shed its skin, but was pretty awesome to the taste.
We were going to go to the fireworks and parade at the festival, my laziness got the better of us, ah well.
Thames Festival
Felt a bit like someone janked in my tank from a 65 metre bank this morning, possibly a horrible combination of beer, and no food initially. Or I'm just shit. Spent a little bit of time recovering in the morning, then left quick march, with Shing and Rex to meet Shing's friend, Boon, at the railway station of Stratford. 
Some DLR action to Bank then we walked to southwark bridge, where we heard the food section of the festival was occurring. Huge range of food stalls, so I had some chilli chips, a sausage roll and a bbq'd sweetcorn. Met up with Jacky, then powered towards Tower Bridge to the beginning of the festival. Lots of little stalls selling all sorts of things that people like Shing buy ;) Pretty cool, there was also a huge whale, which was apparently filled with children on closer inspection, 
it also appeared some ageing bald guy had an ever closer look as he emerged from the whales 'slit' looking far too happy with himself. And he had his wang in a small boy. Whoa that was uncalled for. Sorry kids.
Anyway, Shing blackmailed some people into giving her helium balloons, and she rang half of Shropshire in her crazy voice. Then she took some helium and rang the rest of Shropshire. HA HA. Lollerskates, that's right kids, I'm back on form. Anyway, Rex the alcoholic made us get a pint of organic beer each, well one was a pilsner and one was regular, which we switched halfway through. 
Quite nice actually. Along the way there were various performances (such as punch and judy), live music etc. After more wandering along the Thames, we became peckish, and munched some epic Hog rolls, and saw some boat race people go by. Had a pint in a nice pub, on the Thames, Boon headed off and I got a sausage roll, as I couldn't stop eating. Onwards, and we came across an amazingly choreographed Korean fighting comedy, which we watched for a while. Some great moves and lots of laughs, just very hard to see over the crowd, even for someone of my great stature.
Finally came to what I was waiting for, the Parkour/Parcore/Free Running section, which had Urban Freeflow showing off some moves, including blue devil, which was pretty dope. Unfortunately, show was just come to an end, but was still sweet. Dave, we need to Parkour. Go.
Anyway, Shing then bought a cool hoodie, and we walked across the river, while taking some epic photos of the city I love with every fibre of my being. 
Had a nice walk to meet up with John and his brother in a tucked away pub off of Carnaby Street. A few nice beers, some people (who weren't me I add) threw up, and then we headed back to our humble abode. Great day. I love London.
Friday's Child was made of snow, his frozen hands hurt more than you will ever know
Met Rex and Shing in the maze of a station that is Canary Wharf. We wibbled around attempting to find the pub that we were going to met John at, while I stood out like a ragamuffin gangsta foo'. Damn suits. Found the pub eventually, we were all like "sup" beer me up. Asim was there as well, and we met one of their friends, Katie (from ameriland). Then some beer happened and all 3 of us somehow got quite merry/drunk after 2 beers so we did declare "to the food good sir", to which no one replied, so we mosaicked to the Slug and Lettuce. Another beer and an excellent Thai Green Curry in banana tree leaf later, we grappled with the tube system and went to see John's flat. Which is amazingly swish, though he pays 720 a month!!! We chill played with their awesome cat Kiwi, I decided to get some more beer which I didn't really drink. In an attempt to get back all the tubes started shutting down, so we fucked the police and got a black taxi back, for just 6 English pounds each.
Delectable.
I miss those tectonics
It feels like I'm in a state of flux, if you don't mind the Doctor Who addiction levels. I wish I was still out there, amongst all the spinning, but another part of me wants to just do nothing and vegetate. I'm all a bit fuzzy, and I miss so much, but can't focus enough to work out who or what in particular.
The world is so much bigger than all of this, and all of us. There's so much out there, it seems pointless to not like things, or to have so much negativity. Or to be alone.
Things I have or haven't done
Monday: Watched insane amounts of smallville, pretty good, kind of want to know what happens next, though according to all sources Lex isn't in the next series?! Main problem is, smallville keeps me up till 4am every morning, so I wake up late. Bad Tom.
Tuesday: Today I applied for a bank job. Hopefully I was more productive than just that.
Wednesday: Went to see the Dark Knight with Shing in the Finchley Road O2 centre, rex had a hurtie tummy so didn't come with us. Had a v.nice baguette and cheesecake in spoons before hand. Dark Knight is awesome, though kind of wish everyone hadn't hyped it up so much before hand. Still was very good.
Thursday: This evening we went to Asda after various amounts of confrontational drama that I tried to hide from. Still got lots of food. Played Spore a bit, its alright but a bit boring and repititive. Russ got drunk
Proof #1235 that I drink too much coffee:
Raffle: she told me that she ate my fish *frowns*
Tommeh: ah.
Tommeh: was hoping we could replace him before u found out
Tommeh: *Sighs*
Raffle: *cries*
Tommeh: *licks*
Tommeh: I made a funny!
Tommeh: fishie is alright
Tommeh: we did discover russ got a bit carried away with teh amount he fed him, but it's all gravy
Tommeh: not literally
Tommeh: well not after we changed the water
Tommeh: HAW HAW
Tommeh: *Sighs*
Tommeh: help.
Raffle: *snorts*
Spent the whole day in Ikea
Kill me now. We got a coffee table for £13, as well as a number of glasses, a storage device for towels etc, and a few other things I can't really remember. Though on first entering the store we headed straight for the restaurant, where I had some cheap fish and chips, plus a croissant. I got a cool laundry basket as well. We didn't get a sofa as it wasn't in stock, even though it said it was when we got back home. *sighs*
Confusingly, it wasn't this sofa.
'sup fuckwangles
That's right, the internet has returned to my finger tips, my toe tips and all other tips I may possess. Humour and detailed food consumption to follow...
Abandonment Issues
So Rex got a job, and hates my face, so has abandoned me. So for once I was excellently proactive, even without the internet. I wrote loads of letters in the morning, and sent them off. I deposited a number of checks and bought a security chest to sort out all my post in. I did some sneaky facebook usage, and not on my phone, even though I have an unlimited net plan on it now. I also got a cheap printer from Wilcos, it's a HP all in one shazam, and was just 29.99. Brilliant.
I also got a haircut in the Elvis barbers at the end of the road. I now look eastern european much to my dismay. Turns out it wasn't as bad as I first made out. In the evening I cooked an epic amount of rice, and Shing brought duck and various other chinese meats for a very nice meal with the house mates, Viv, Junella, Anthony (or greg as we like to know him) and Jackie. I cooked slightly too much rice. Viv and Junella brought lots of cake as well. Yummy. Spent the evening watching crazy chinese films with the fighting and the such like. Surprisingly good.
Succinct mind pockets
This I have done in the past few days:
- Sunday: Recover from the night before, excellent bacon feast, people slowly departed, someone had sex in their face and we failed to go to the cinema in the end. So instead we played Cod4 on the Xbox till late afternoon, when the twits went home and a sense of normality resumed.
- Tuesday: My awesome argos wardrobe came, and the fantastic team of Rex and I spent 2 hours and 45 minutes building it. Handles won't go on :(
- Wednesday: Rex and I bust into Liverpool st, Rex stabbed up some recruitment agencies, and we met Danu for lunch, excellent Gourmet burger.
- Thursday: Lovely BT man came, and broke into my wall via a metal spinning contraption. Hooked us all up, instant line, but we have to wait till wednesday next week for O2 to do our internet :(. Nina randomly arrived a few days early!
Updates faster than a master blaster
29th: Interview with recruitment agency, waste of time mainly.
30th: Interview with actual company, went well enough, exciting company, nice people.
1st: 2 hour 40 min interview. Grilled, recruitment lady was wrong about there being no tech questions, unsurprisingly. I care not, so to coffee and relaxation.
Twits Extravanganza
The twits and people slowly appeared for their celebration after I spent the morning sorting out my shocking excuse for a bedroom. Much waiting around occurred, so had a drink or two, while showing off the house. Eventually headed off to the Goose in Stratford where we met up with Dan and Tracey. Nandos fucked us over on a table booking so we resorted to a Caribbean restaurant. where I got a Goat Curry, but it tasted a bit like canteen food. 
Luckily for everyone, the waitresses were informed of the current age related predicament, and some humourous twit embarrassment based around singing and clapping. Many people looked peed off. Next stop London!
Where we proceeded to wander around and not do much for ages, until we met up with Shing's Katie, who was really nice, and we faffed around Leicester Square for a while, until in the end I was like "Hess, take us to a cool club". And he did. And we drank. Hess paid a topless muscular dude to hug ruffle, so we could take a photo. Unfortunately, Cory's camera died, so Hess had to rape me at the bar ("noo noo hess, go in again") and get my camera. 
At some point cory and I went and bust some moves on the dance floor, and had some jager shots. Then the others joined us and we boogied the night away.
Eventually left just after 3am, and got the 25 back, but only after shing disappeared into a random chinese shop, where I followed her, and she got me boneless awesome duck and rice, that I devoured. Bus wasn't too bad, about 40 min, though ruffle puff hated it. Sleeps.
Dance. Jagermeister. 40min 25 bus home.
Concisely in your brain pocket
On wednesday raffle evaporated back home, so that on the Thursday (yesterday) she could jet off the coasts so close, but so far. Jealousy consumes me. Ruffle moved in the same day, missing her expertly, and his room became full of huge boxes. His mommy was very kind and took me home, where I had to wrestle with my crappy car that had got run down over the 7 months I was away. So a friend my mum knows was kind enough to charge it over night, but when I tried to start it, it sounded extremely sorry for itself. Then, in my attempt to get the car over to his house to get tires pumped for incoming MOT the next morning, the car slipped into some crazy error message that refused to let the engine rev, and I couldn't go faster than 18mph. Insane.
Eventually got it going normally, and took it for a drive to sevenoaks roundabout, past poll hill, but it slipped into the error state twice on the way, so I did the drive again, and it seemed fixed. I then collapsed from starvataion and ate a pizza. Good times. Next morning, woke up early to wash the car so I could pass MOT, went to Chelsfield Motors, who passed my little fiesta ever so quickly, then packed up the last of my shizzle, and drove back to the house with excellent reliability, and threw everything haphazardly into my room. Said "easy now" to the children, then bust on back into town to meet up with Maddie, in Liverpool St starbucks, followed by some excellent fish and chips in a little pub just down the street. After some navigational based humour, we met up with Sam, who took us to another SB and we chatted for a while, before we all had to emanispate back home. Good times. We probably watched films or killed people in the evening
The EX in LANDON!
or something equally whatever. Had an awesome sleep in my new bed with 1.5 trillion tog duvet. In the morning I was like, "Yo yo biatches" then skidaddled off to meet Pete, Chloe and Mike in Victoria Station, where Chloe was impressively already drunk after 2 ciders, so we shot off to Green Park, and found some nice pubs, 
The Kings Arms especially, and had a few bevvies. We then bust on back to Leicester square and walked to the embankment, where after some odd failing to find a walkabout, we went back to the south bank for a very nice Mexican and a beer (brahma), while we pondered our options. We became more determined and returned across the river and successfully found the targeted walkabout, stayed there for a while for everyone's fair share of drinking games, drama and winnage. 
After we all bid farewell, I navigated all forms of transport successfully, until I had to rely on my legs. These failed. Epically. And I fell elbow first upon the floor in front of a dude who was all like "Hey guy, you alright" to which I spluttered my apologies and scampered home.
Tired, shattered, and mildly battered
Hungover is the morning state, and the state of hate that shall wait for no man. Or something. So we(the lads) decided to see Hellboy 2, God, Jesus, Zeus, FSM and Xenu knows why, but we did. It was meh. Not particularly good, not really bad, it just existed in suspense in the no-mans land of forgettable big budget films. Better than slicing our genitals with rusty razors though. We returned triumphant to begin the BBQ, lots of nice meat but I stayed off the alcohol as I thought it was the best course of action for my stomach. , Cory and Hessam turn up. Nice. Home to sleep in bed for first night, room total mess but sorted a bit.
Tired in my pants
Was how I felt when we woke up before 7am, so I could drive the van back, with raffle in it, so that we could beat traffic and get van back in time. Well the trip took a stupidly short amount of time and I could drop everything off that needed to be dropped off before getting the van back in plenty of time. Guy didn't even check if it was smashed up or not. Bonus, as I may or may not have scraped it when Susie took me through a VERY NARROW area of England. Anyway, 
moving swiftly on, I fell asleep at home because my battery was on empty. Soon Rex had driven home and back, picked me up, we went and sorted out Chez STARR a bit, and then headed off to Dartford, to Dan and Tracey's place of inhabiting. Bid our welcomes to the guys, then headed on off into Dartford centre for
a very nice curry, and a few cobras before finding a large pub that Laura used to know. Was quite good, drank vast quantities of everything, and shots were involved, followed by Dan and Laura strutting some fancy stuff on the dance floor.
As last orders came around and the place was thinning out,we decided to go to a bar/discothek called Crush, that was purple much to Tracey's liking. Though then Simone and Tracey went home :( 
We drank and danced more and craziness happened as usual. On way back, dan begged a pizza/fast food owner to re-open his shop, which he did much to everyones surprise. I had some awesome wedges that I proceeded to force on everyone, including Tracey when we got back. I then fell asleep on coach, satisfied. Great evening, hats off to Dartford.
Never trust a bunny
or a van. I hate vans. Today Rex and I woke up at a moderately early hour for 2 likely lads without jobs, and managed to hire a rickety suspicious looking van
from a suspicious supplier, to allow us to move into our lovely new house. Now this was an extra tall transit rip off, so not the greatest to drive, still rex drove it to Whitstable, we visited his grandparents, who gave us half their house, specially a really nice dining table, and after saying our fairwells we arrived at Lord Rexalot's abode. After quite a while, we managed to fill most of the van up with Rex's stuff, mostly thanks to his brother's superhuman strength, in that he somehow could hold the entire weight of his wardrobe while going down the stairs. Epic. Rex then drove back to the Orp, where we threw in ruffle's stuff and one or two bits of mine that would fit, before we all headed to Stratford, with ruffle's car behind.
Spent ages unloading vast amounts of stuff and pottering around the house, and using Ruffle's Mum's hoover to clean up the place a bit. Russ headed back home, and then rex and I went back to fill up the van with my stuff and Raffle's stuff, by now it was getting quite late (about 6pm) and we had failed to have dinner. We were also epically tired, blackwall tunnel driving in a crappy van that drifts when u try steer, plus the brakes are a bit like cotton wool. Neither is a dashboard that doesn't light up when ur lights are on, so you can't quite see what speed you're going, and to make matters worse I was driving on my own on the way, and I thought I smashed everything in the back, including all of raffles delicate stuff. I hadn't though. Much.
Anyway after throwing all that stuff in the house, I went off, and tried to get to Shing's Victoria pad via the help of Susie the Sat Nav. I hate susie. After some nice detours across tower bridge and back over westminster bridge I finally made it there, and waited looking EXTREMELY dodgy in a petrol forecourt as Jackie, Viv and Shing slowly loaded up the van with TONS of stuff. Finally, all packed, and took a route of sheer lunacy back to stratford, thanks to susie again. Arrived around 2am or something crazy and unpacked everything, then collapsed in pile, all of us in the basement with sleeping bags as the hippys at our estate agents had failed to deliver the beds in time. Was cosy though. Even if we have to wake up stupid early to drop off van.
The Condition of Faffery
This week I'm sure I've participated in a number of events that will blow your mind. Not many of which come to mind right now. On Saturday we all went to Simone's BBQ, which was great, especially as Dan and Tracey were there, and we all scoffed meat and a few beverages in a civilised situation. On the monday rex came down just for a small massacre and so we all went to monday club. Not too much drinking. I think. Didn't recognise many people there.
Today (thursday), after, me trapsing around london debt collecitng money from raffle and shing for our house deposit and first month of rent, 
I met Ruff and Rex in Stratford and we spent the next few hours, waiting in the car, faffing around, and waiting for various people who weren't there to sign everything. Eventually it was all sorted, just before closing and we got the house!!... except no house keys for us, so Rex had to run to the nearest locksmith and get them cut. Those crazy fools at Belvoir. Decided not to stay the night as we need to get van tomorrow and move everything in the world in. So we first checked the house/showed it off to ruffle. Currently have no beds or furniture, but we're happy.
New Hobby #Twelfty
Worrying my mum into thinking I'm gay by playing Wham quite loud upstairs in my room. Slammin'
I am also wearing quite short shorts.
*remembers why he wanted to get out of the country in the first place*
Everything is so complicated, and ridiculous. Nothing works correctly, everything costs money and takes more paper work than a french frog quiz. Yes I am going to get a job. No I'm not going to become a permanent bum. Yes I will do this and that, and whatever. Please don't worry, things tend to go alright for me, it's all good, ease off. For now I am focusing on getting my car legal, and moving into our new lovely house. And looking forward to an awesome weekend at D&Ts.
shh. Humour later.
Today we have mostly
not been moving in to any houses in the Stratford, London area. So instead I met up with the one they call Colin and decided to make sure the Harvey was still there. It was. And we were joined by Simone, Trev and Ruffle for a few bevvys before returning to our respective abodes. Nice. I thought this entry was going to be longer that it is. I'm sure some humour occurred, possibly involving Trev desiring to build us something for the house, like a bbq, or shelving, or tree house or bondage table.
The Return
After an incredibly long flight from Tokyo, we touched down with amazing perfection to the hallowed turf of Heathrow airport, after a beautiful approach across London, over Stratford, seeing the O2, tower bridge, westminster, and most major touristic landmarks. Progressed through the pointlessness that is terminal 5, although it's really pretty/clean, waiting for a tube to take me on a 20 second journey seemed a slight waste of soul. Thankfully Rex, Shing and Ruffle were at arrivals to meet me, which was a nice surprise and they even created an awesome welcome back sign. Unfortunately for them, they forgot my awesomeness (ahem), and I saw them before they say me, and Shing even walked straight past me to look at arrivals. Using skillery I dropped bags, said "yo" to the guys, and crept up behind shing and I was all like "Nah, I don't think he's gonna come through that way". Much to her initial confusion. KABLAM. I'm back in town.
To recover my lack of sleeping, we went to the only coffee shop I was unable to find on shores so distant: Cafe Nero. An americano and a chat later we were ready to hit the road, after a quick gander at the rest of the terminal. Drive home sucked due to traffic but we got back eventually and did what any Orpingtonian should, and went straight to the Harvest Moon, where we began consuming a strange coloured liquid, with amusing effect. Rachel and her flatmate from France, Shelby, came along as well as Simone for a bit, and we descended in a highly humourous conversation of 
witticisms, drunkenness and rape. I mean innuendo, culminating in Shelby feeling up Shing in the bosom with a flower. Kapow. Also got a v.nice Thai Green Curry from their extended curry range. After returning home in an overpacked rex-mobile, I babbled in my usual (non)sense to mother and crashed out shattered.
I have been perusing my mind
and my soul and my tin of baked beans, but mainly, and for the purposes of this post, my own blog and I have concluded that uni life was frickin' awesome, and so were all the shinanigans we got up to. I am now expecting a high level of craziness and lunacy based contraptions for our new house. I also will try for the 5th time to get a random post button on this blog, though not sure how, can anyone help (looks at dave). UPDATE: Found a cool widget, so now just click Random Post to your right ->.
What do you mean I shouldn't repair electric cables with plasters? It's worked 3 times hasn't it? Plugs are meant to hiss aren't they?
Gah. Insomnia last night. That'll learn me for going to bed at 11. I was feeling like "just get me back to England" last night, mainly due to some excellent band related chat with Ad, but after an awesome day seeing the amazing sights of Kyoto, it has occured to me that this amazing adventure is coming to an end. Bum clouds anonymous. Why are there constantly children chanting in this hotel, and where are they coming from? I may now use 'Japan' and 'lunacy' as interchangeable words.
Big Sleeves
Gigs are most excellent, though everytime I see a band I still always wish I was the one up there on the stage, but as I said to Rex, my singing shatters eyeballs. I have so many bands to check out now though, on top of bands like Neutral Milk Hotel, Kevin Devine and 'I can make a mess like nobody's business'. I've also got bands from summer sonic, like+
- Los Campesionos!
- The Subways
- Becca
- Blood Red Shoes
and probably more besides. I must find more to quench my thirst though, suggestions? I may have to ask Dan or Sam, they tend to have 1 or 2 up their sleeve.
I'll tell you what's stressfull
"Stressful?" I hear you cry with somewhat trepid lunacy "How can you be stressed on a 6 month holiday, why I ort to come down there and give you what for". To which I would reply "what for five, haw haw haw" and then proceed to explain how I can't organise my life of meeting people when I get back because I only have a few weekends and I already have like 3 of them booked up with either moving into my own house/celebrating I'm alive and in england, celebrating Danu and Tracey's moving into their house (which they have kindly delayed till I get back, well I'm telling myself that, they may just have been covering everything in a thin layer of plastic to protect it from the ensuing carnage) and the Twits birthday shinanigans which I am sure will involve some form of intoxicating substance. Possibly poppers if Adam's record is anything to go by. Relax....
Anyway, my point is, ARGH. But now pete is going away or something in September, I need to meet up with countless other people, especially a variety of travel reunions, and all in the mean time I need to find a good job, not piss off my mum by only seeing her for 1 night (and what a night it'll be, nudge nudge wink wink, ew ew) in 6 months AND at some point visit exeter as I miss it so much. And Stu smells of cat rape in a vice factory. Furthermore, I had another interesting and rambling point to say, but I got distracted by the farce that is Facebook, oh yeah, all this trouble is because the rest of you lazy ass mofos have jobs, which I don't appreiciate in the slightest. Except maybe Rex and Russ, so we can be some form of rambling/hiking trio, that cross the countryside with nothing but a headscarf and a pocket of beer change between us. Maybe a costa coffee as well. And a llama. Plus an xbox. And some other comical and seemingly random paraphinallia.
Who else thinks I need some form of non Japanese human contact? Yes me to. Or food before I drink strong coffee in the morning. Yes me to. Hush.
P.S. I also need to get down to Brighton and bash out some gigs with Icelandic Dan, for he is the king of all things Icelandicly cool. (yes yes I know I need to see YOU as well, please don't comment and whine, if I mentioned everyone I need to see this post would already be longer, more rambling and far more hilarious than it already is)
Getting down with the sickness
So capsules aren't great to sleep in, especially if they roast you alive. No matter, I have gained some form of illness, or it could just be my body expelling all the crap I breathed in, in china, as I threw up quite spectacularly and felt a bit better then. I did manage, however, to get my Summer Sonic 2008 tickets (Osaka style), whoop whoop, in the face language barriers. My current plan of bands I want to see is:
9th
11.20 The Ting Tings(Sky Stage)
13.10 The Hoosiers(Ocean Stage)
14.20 Biffy Clyro (Sonic Stage)
15.30 The Kooks(Ocean Stage)
19.40/19.50 Cold Play(Ocean Stage) / Fatboy Slim(Sky Stage)
10th
14:20-The Subways(Ocean Stage)
15.30-Zebrahead(Ocean Stage)
16.55-Panic A The Disco(Ocean Stage)
17.10
17.15 Death Cab For Cutie(Sonic Stage)
18.10 Lost Prophets(Sky Stage)
19.55 The Prodigy(Ocean Stage)
Bands i miss due to clashes: New Found Glory, part of Panic At The Disco, The Verve, The Fratellis, Sex Pistols
The most annoying part is that Death Cab overlaps Panic At The Disco. Only Brand New could stop me seeing Death Cab For Cutie however. Interestingly the summer sonic site doesn't provide details of how to get to the stadium, but that'll be half the fun I'm sure.
Well that's all depressing in your chest cavity...
I think I need to post something less emo so I don't return to the England and am greeted by a heap of blubbering wrecks. Interestingly, Japanese keyboards, like Tokyo in fact, are mega crazy, and have more keys in awkward places than a contortionist fetish locksmith.
Gaffaw.
we'll blow off our heads in despair
I actually felt old today, as I pondered devoting my life to one endeavour and realised 23 isn't 21 anymore. I'm not normally one to worry about birthdays, or that I'm getting older, as I've only lived a quarter of my life and it felt like a real long time (not in a bad way i should point out). However, for nearly 20 years of that I had little choice in what I did or my future. Now in the land of careers, travelling, responsibility and all other manner of things, I'm not sure I can fit it all in. Have I still got time to be a rock star or famous sportsman?
What if I wanna do a phd?
or live in Oz for a year?
or travel to India? or down Africa?
or learn Spanish and do South America?
I'm finding it difficult to break out of the mind set that once I start my career I can't stop in case it looks bad, or I can't re-find a job, or I won't progress far enough or earn enough money.
Argh.
And yes I know, I should "just do what i want" but what if I don't know what I want? You could harp on all day in cliché motivational phrases until the cows come home, trample your new Persian rug and demand their supper but it won't change the face that following that advice yourself is far more complex and risky than in some magic fairy ideal.
Also what if I find someone (not fail to tell them for the umpteenth time?)....
LOLLERSKATES!!!1!!1!!one!!!! only joking!
*sighs*
I will possess your heart...
Extreme journal writing on the back of a Chinese bus! Hardcore y'all!
Which you won't appreicate as this was typed at a later date, so instead, here is an ode to July:
Hush now my sweet
although I've lost my feet
under horrific circumstances
from July's empty romances.
do I divide and fall apart?
Waking up in the morning, I received a text from that loveable rogue, Rex, who informed me that I return to the wistful shores of England in 4 weeks. Now I do already know this, but it filled me with a feeling of dead and realisation that I will have to actually stop travelling. Then I was overcome by the same feeling I used to get when I had to go back to school on a cold, damp, grey, english winter's day.
I think I've decided my best plan of action for Japan is to plan my entire stay meticiously, so I make full use of my limited time there. Therefore, I am in need of a Japanese LP, yeah you know me, swigging DC like in 73.
And your face is stupid.
I also had a dream about some girl I met on a train, and we had some sort of whirlwind romance or connection for those few minutes on the train, but then my stop came up and we had a to part company. I woke up feeling quite forlorn and emo.
Sleep comes with a knife, fork and a spoon...
Time for a tech attack in your raptor powered rack. My new Chinese phone, made by unknown manufacturer 'K-Touch' is surprisingly good. The D770, at 80 quid, although feeling cheap, has a 3 mega-pixel camera, large touch sceren, built in telescopic stylus, keypad, motion sensor AND can run 2 sim cards simultanously with no switching required. Great for the gadget whoring backpacker. So I have an English sim and a Chiense sim plugged in there. Comes with 2 batteries, an external battery charger (as well as internal) and an AV cable. Also takes MicroSD cards. AS long as you get someone to swap to English menus it's fine, though the sms dictionary is a bit limited and some error messages are still in chinese. Sim selection is easy and can be done when sending messages and calling. A grand phone and I don't care much about it.
UPDATE: The charger plug is totally mashed and I need a new one. Bum clouds.
Humour
CowboyDan: shit my battery er að renna út
Me: rofl, does english need more electricity?
Well I laughed. Fuck you guys.
erm.
What if I don't come back. What if I don't settle to my cliched computing job in London. what if I find a job where I can travel the world. What if I lose my fear of losing my friends. What if I sing. What if I'm happy with medicore money.
What if I'm alone?
Soon we'll be living in the future.
I rock the mic like a hurricane!
because I rock the mic like a hurricane!
because I rock the mic, Hurricane Fresh!
Apparently, as fresh as a milkman on duty, according to some sources. Not only have I betrayed your trust with this blog but I think I've hyperextended my elbow with my backpack, whatever that means and some wack ass excuse for an airport net terminal cranched up my hand. Did I make up the word jank, because no one else I've met while travelling knows it? Pretty janked up if you ask me.
Apart from my general worry about my chinese visa, my main thoughts are revolving around how it sucks to say goodbye and how I'm going to have to do so much at home to keep things interesting. No more shying away from things. Dan if you're a lunatic and reading this, bust me a list of muserific delicaces being served up in brighton from mid-august onwards!
Other related foibels: I'm very behind on my journal and even worse on my blog. My money is quite an issue, I have no clean clothes, I loved vietnam, I need to take more full body photos (not sexy ones you fiesty kittens - well maybe for 10 quid in an envelope slipped in my rear door if you know what I mean, nudge nudge wink wink haddock), my camera is a bit borked again, a flight to Japan from Beijing is 450 sterling and that was totally a lady boy staring at my doojangles!
In further news: Brand New has taken over my life again. My hair is mega long. I got attacked by elbow mossies. I actually remembered to take my doxy poxy cyclone for 3 days in a row. The dude to my right has psycho eyes. I nearly massacred an entire airport today. Air Asia's Xpress boarding is very sexy. I need a China LP. Jesus and Zeus are currently in a nail biting battle on centre court. My new journal is fabric based. I hope my name is Mr Ooh Tik Aw Pahs Heha, as I'd need to go to some incomprehensible location within the confines of Bangkok airport. The world tilts back and pours and pours and so... Diagonal non-escalator walkways are great. I'll never have to buy adjacent plots of land. We'll never have to rot together underneath dust. I'll never have to lose my baby in the crowd. I should be laughing right now....
An Ode To Vomit:
Cellophane noodles in my mouth,
Slither down my throat to the south,
but I realise too late, and with remorse,
that my food doth follow a reciprocal course.
Raffle's B-day Rampage
Once more with many skills sublime,
you've written a rhyme better than mine.
After 3 days of pondering in lands afar,
Rex said "Just do it" so here I are.
On to the matter of this event every year,
that's filled with sensual joy and birth related cheer.
May you have fun and much joyous applause,
on the one day I hear you can break many laws.
So I'll end this with distant hugging and clutching,
and a kilo of love and inappropriate touching.
A splattering of thoughts
- Girls are far better at 1) remembering to take photos 2) posing for photos AND they are useful in the sense that you can take photos for no reason but can blame it on them. Classic
- Why is it that mossies will attack you, non stop, for about 20 minutes, then suddenly give up on you? Have I run outta blood? Where's the commitment? Where's the love?
- Why have I signed myself up to a night of reading dive manuals when the level of humidity is like that time Zeus hot-boxed his outhouse by boiling up all his succubis?
- Why do no websites have the powerful search tools I required to properly use them?
- I think I've lost of my lyrical prowess, what small amount I had to begin with.
- My hair is out of control and the number one culprit in my water loss problems.
- Get funky on the dance floor and show be a better bop than the bop I got...
- "Don't bangkok too hard" - Dan Dan Icelandic Dan
Do you remember that time,
when I was like .... and you were like.... and after an small interuption we had kippers, and then Sid Vicious was like "Put that spoon down, I've had enough". To which we replied, between smirks and jovial glances, "Oh Sid, your ecentric ways are so devoid of the post-hardcore mind set that we all expect, pass the scones". Though unbeknownst to us, the scones had run out part way through the last century, and a flurry of resulting conflict confirmed this, leaving much of the devastation we see before us right now. No matter, we carried on our merry way, dropping coins to the paupers and conducting informed debates with passing monks on the very crux of the buddhist way of life, in relation to globalisation and the current decline in economic tides. No sooner had we achieved, what in our own subjective mindset appeared to be, enlightenment, than we became hidiously paranoid in terms of the whole juxtaposition of the situation, and lightly refused dessert.
Luckily times have changed, but I still look back with an odd envy at the naive boy I used to be.
What do you do when your mum texts you saying "Wish I could see a sea horse" in a despondent manner, well as despondent as you can be via the medium of textual communications. I dunno what you do, but what I do is write a blog entry to detach myself from the situation, allowing a more rational outlook. And then I decide I want steak for dinner. Good O.
I think I had something witty and pulsating to say, which would be expected as I just had some coffee, but my typie fingers are devoid of any literary splurges, so I must bid you a Jew or two.
Drunken Shinanigans
Well I'm diasterously behind on my blog, but I thought I'd relay an interesting night Joff and I participated in last night, once more involving alcohol. And unlike in Byron Bay it did not conclude with us drawing giant knobs on the beach.
The night started like any other, wasting more money eating out in a nice local restaurant, a chinese this time, v.yummy. We then cruised in a pub across the road, which was pretty empty, and Joff played $5 on the pokies there, which lasted a good length of time. Our hunt for live music then began but for some reason we just settled for a bar with seats outside. We had one, then moved on to an awesome bar which was playing linkin park, papa roach, etc though we were the only peeps in there and it shut at 10. After swift drinking and rockin out, we found yet another bar that had live music, but they stopped playing nearly as soon as we entered the premises! The general consensus was a more long term hunt for live music, which only resulted in nearly paying $50 to go in some club/gig place. Luckily, after talking to a bouncer we found a club to go to.
A gay club.
Great fun though! and we partied to the wee hours, including getting Joff his first shot ever! Sambuca in the face. We took some humourous photos with some guys and girls, before leaving due to excessive alcohol consumption. It seemed cunning to then go to Maccy D's and get some form of food. After which we agreed we were too drunk to go back to hostel and should walk around a bit, which we did until we got to the river side. I promptly lay down, messiah stylie, and fell asleep for 2 minutes, and once Joff woke me up I had apparently lost the last hour of memory instantly. So much so that I decided I wanted Maccy D's not realising we'd already been. Needless to say I got 20 chicken nuggets and all was well.
Grand.
I'm not actually dead, and neither is this blog
"Please don't forget about me" aroused my blog "I'll always exist in the hearts of your readers and the twinkling in the eye of the child who playfully uses a racist remark as a form of witty retort"
"Pah" I ejaculated furiously "our readers care not for us anymore, with a lack of updates and a stagnent smell in the air, all is lost"
"You lie" my blog grinded
"True."
And then I regained conciousness from smashing my skull upon the ocean's bed.
Wasting words on lower cases and capitals
I miss blogging on this blog. I miss not being 20 light years behind on my other blog. I'm sure I used to have a greater grip on the English language, and I could mold it to my very will. Though maybe not. This post has little purpose except to remind you I exist. I'm going for chinese. I expect to drink my weight in Chinese Tea. And Brand New is still and will always be the greatest band in the world. Yes sir.
In related news, Rex and I have decided to start an indie alt-rock post-hardcore band. When I get back. We'll woo the girls with our deep lyrics, hard hitting palm-muted power chords, floppy hair, and general emotonic undertones.
Raffle can supply the musical talent we might need by our 3rd album. Good show.
In related news, I'm collecting various graffeti I've seen under beds and in toilets, current winner is:
goes bob bob bobbing along,
Shoot the Bastard,
Shoot the Bastard,
Shoot Shoot Shoot the Bastard.
Neutral Milk Hotel
Note to Self: Remember that band, and their album "In the Aeroplane Over The Sea". Good boy.